INS jokes
If a gay person is vegan, how does he have sex? He will keep getting meat stuck in his ass and in his throat.
You built like you in the 1980's!
Fila is a cool brand. I fill a cock in your man's pussy.
What do white people and fences have in common? They both get jumped by Mexicans.
Where does a French cat live?
- In Purr-is
OR
- In the Catacombs
OR
- In a chat-eau.
"I'm the big man, catching the kids in my big van." - Ben 2021
A police pulls over a Mexican man trying to get into America. The Mexican man comes up with some sob story and the police say, "All right, all right ok," says the police, "I'll let you go if you can come up with a sentence that has the words green, pink, and yellow in it." The Mexican thought about it long and hard for almost 45 minutes and then the police says, "Ok ok let's hear it" after waiting impatiently. The Mexican said, "Ok ok don't rush me. I'm ready." The Mexican replied, "Ok when my phone green green, I pink it up and say Yellow!"
What's the only thing that doesn't change in Alabama?
The last names after marriage!
Who are the fastest readers?
911 victims. They went through 88 stories in 7 seconds.
The gayest person in the world is Pacman. You can pay him to eat 200 balls.
Me: Hey dad, I'm in debt, my dick got cut off, I have depression, and I am suicidal!
Dad: Hi in debt, my dick got cut off, I have depression, and I am suicidal! I'm dad!
What is the difference between a woman and my fridge?
Only one moans when I put my meat in it.
A man sits in a bar and gets seriously drunk to the point where he vomits on his shirt. He panics.
The bartender asked, "What's wrong, sir?"
The man replies, "I got drunk and vomited, my wife will kill me."
The bartender says, "Put $20 in the shirt and say someone puked on you and they paid you for the wash."
So the man walks out with the $20 he put in his shirt pocket. The next day, the wife said, "Why is there vomit on your shirt?"
The man says, "Someone puked on me and gave me $20 bucks for the wash."
The wife pulls out the money. "There is $40," says the wife.
"Oh, he also peed on me and paid for the wash, too." The man walks away believing he didn't get caught by his wife.
Why was the leper hockey game canceled?
It was because of a face-off in the corner.
What did one orphan say to another?
"Get in the Batmobile, Robin."
If Pete and Chasten Buttigieg had a baby together, it would be a turd covered in semen.
Why shouldn't you tell a secret in a corn field?
Because they are full of ears!
Now that was a corny joke.
And yes, it was rather a-maize-ing.
My son asked me, “What is angel cake made of?”
I reply by listing the ingredients in Mr. Kipling angel cakes. Then he shouts “STOP!” I stop as I reach food colorings. He slowly crawls towards me and says in a whisper, “Well, in my angel cake, I put angels in them.”
I freaked out about this, so I calmed down and asked who did you put in this angel cake. He said, “Grandma, the one who died last Saturday.”
Asdf movie: meow meow I’m a cow.
Me to my villagers in Minecraft: chick chick my guns cocked so frick.
At the library, I got in trouble for putting a cooking book in the women's section.