INS jokes
Why does Ezra Miller’s Flash run in a straight line in The Flash movie? Bro ain’t straight.
My dad was a great pilot...
He died in 9/11.
Why is it inappropriate when guys say their girlfriends are their “Partners in Crime”?
Like we get it, bro, she’s underage.
What do you call two old men drooling in their wheelchairs?
The 2028 US election.
What’s the difference between a fetus and a jar of pickles?
The pickles aren’t as tasty in a jar.
Motherhood is like a fairy tale, but in reverse. You start out in a beautiful ball gown and end up in stained rags cleaning up after little people.
What does B.I.B.L.E stand for?
Bullshit In Book Lacking Evidence.
Why can’t you private text someone in a community?
Because a community has more than two people.
How do you call an iPhone cover in Germany?
An apple bag. 😜
What's the definition of suspicious?...
A nun doing sit-ups in a cucumber field. 💀
Why can’t orphans get married in Alabama?
Because they don’t have a sister.
When the school shooter starts doing Fortnite dances and the autistic kid joins in.
Why do orphans only drink water in cereal?
'Cause Dad never brought home the milk...
Yo mama is so fat, she can’t even fit in the suitcase.
Yo mama, why do you have to jump in the pool as soon as I can find the water on Mario? I mean, Mario jump to Mars!
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
The 9/11 victims. They went through 200 stories.
I walk in on my mum and she's in the middle of pulling off my dad's boxers. I said, "Mum, you really spoil those dogs!"
What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?
Virgin Mobile.
These jokes are EGGxactly why I became a comedian, and I know how to BAKE on breakfast.
2 jokes in a row babyyyyy!
1. Are you talking to me because I think you talked to my backside?
2. Your mom must taste good because it is always in your mouth.
3. My foot lasts longer than your life.