INS jokes
Can we stop talking about 9/11? I lost my dad in it.
He was a great pilot.
Why is Trump always in debt? His university isn't paid off yet!
Yo mama's so stupid, she got locked in the grocery store and starved to death.
I adopted a dog. It's gone now.
At least homeless people in China are not starving.
The emo girl in my class did her photosynthesis project on a tree. Little did she know that would be her demise later on.
Three kids one day found a magical slide. There was a sign next to it saying, “Whatever you wish for comes true once you slide down.” One kid stepped up and slid down. He wished for a river of chocolate, thus he swam in a chocolate river.
The second kid slid down and wished for a mountain of money. He then landed in a pile of money. The third kid went down and said, “Weeeeeeee!”
I've just been fired from the clock-making factory after all those extra hours I put in.
When you think of the word "simp," you think of a girl. "Girl" stands for ghosts in real life. Another word for simp is "ding dong." Put them together, and you get ghosts in real life with ding dongs.
What do a shopping cart and a wheelchair have in common? They both carry vegetables.
What do you get if you cross diarrhea with incest?
I don't know.
Neither do I, but it runs in the family.
Where do you find the best comedians?
In the funny farm!
If Trump pooped in a toilet, the toilet would die.
I was the manager at a McDonald’s in Turin when I saw Penaldo walk in and submit a job application. I asked him to show me his skills and experience, but he just started diving and asking for pens and tap-ins. I was confused until Penaldo told me that’s all he knows how to do.
Why can’t an orphan play games with a full house in them? Because they don’t know what a full house is.
What do you call a rocky formation covered in meat?
Meatcanyon.
(Meatcanyon is actually a YT that has like 1M subs so watch some of his content if you want to, lol!)
Why was the dog staying in the shade?
Because it didn't want to be a hot dog!
Two nuns in a bathtub.
One nun asks, "Where's the soap?"
The other nun says, "It sure does."
Why did the man laugh when he only had just one nickel and one penny in his pocket?
He had a 6 cents of humor.
What happens if the dumbest person from Europe goes to the US?
The average IQ increases in both places.
9/11 victims are the best readers.
They went through hundreds of stories in a few seconds.