INS jokes

Voting is like doing a group project in school.

I did my part, but I’m worried the rest of you are going to fuck this up.

Why did the human eat cereal in the bathroom?

So he could querk.

I just heard that the inventor of the autocorrect died the other day.

May he rest in pizza.

A pirate walks into a bar and has a ship's wheel in his pants.

The bartender asks, "What's with the wheel in your pants?"

The pirate replies, "Yarrr! It's drivin' me nuts!"

Why don’t rappers play hide and seek?

Because good luck finding someone who’s always in the booth!

When you tell the men in the suits you can see that the demons of your sins are watching you...

But they know you're blind.

What is the difference between a hundred dead babies and a Ferrari?

I don't have a Ferrari in my garage!

Technoblade be doing skyblock in heaven now.

How many animals can you fit in a pair of underpants?

A. A cock and a few hairs (hares).

I'll put white in your smile.

How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But you need 5000 Soviet troops in case he goes on strike!

What do 15-year-old boys and washing machines have in common?

They both like keeping one sock for themselves.

I was told to burn calories, so I threw your mom in the fire.

Once a woman suspected that her husband was fucking their daughter at night. So she made a plan. That night, she gave her daughter sleeping pills and told her husband that you go to sleep, I have a headache and I will sleep on the sofa in the drawing room today. After everyone slept, she picked up her sleeping daughter and laid her on the sofa and went to her bed and lay down. After an hour, the door of the room opened and one man entered the room and jumped on the bed and fucked her intensely for 2 hours. Then she turned on the light with the bed switch and said, "You definitely didn't expect me." "I definitely didn't expect you, MOM! But you are more delicious than sister"! Her son replied in surprise!

How do you get a boy to share something? Bring in Michael Jackson's bed.

Do you like pudding? Pudding deez nuts in your mouth!

What's the difference between an American police man and a Christian?

At least a Christian kneels in church.

What do you call a dick that doesn't fit in an asshole?

A misfit.

But she hasn't tried the position with her new boyfriend, so she invites him to a romantic dinner.

After dinner, she tells her boyfriend about her desire for it, but her boyfriend was clueless about such acts, so she tells him to strip naked on the couch and lay on top of him naked in the 69 position. She starts sucking him off and starts waiting for him to do the same, but the bf didn't know what to do, so he just lay there. Suddenly, the girl had an urge to fart but held it in because her asshole was right near his bf's face. Suddenly, she loses control and lets one out. She apologizes profusely and continues sucking him. A couple of minutes later, she feels the urge again and lets another fart rip near his face. The BF throws the girl from the couch, gets up, and says, "Bitch if you think I'll be lying here for 67 more of those, you're fucking crazy."

I kicked my leg into my dad's balls in 1999.