INS jokes
What does the SpongeBob intro and a pedophile have in common?
"Are you ready kids?"
How do cats relieve themselves in front of people? By licking their puss.
At one point in your life, you were exactly pi years old.
I’m always the first person in line at school for lunch.
I just cut everyone.
Why can't you be gay and in a wheelchair?
Because you can't be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.
Dating in your 30s is like looking for a parking spot...
The good ones are all taken. The rest are either handicapped or too far away.
What has 2 arms but no legs?
A crippled woman with no more meaning in her life.
The brain named itself, and when the brain realized that it named itself, it was surprised.
But maybe, it was a spelling mistake and the brain wanted the name Brian. We all have a little Brian in us!
New business idea: let's put a KFC in Africa and a watermelon shop.
What do lesbians and mechanics have in common?
They both use strap on tools.
I was in a wheelchair for a few weeks last month.
I went through a super traumatic experience, and I *wheely* hope I made a good *roll* model!
Why does Adolf hate golf?
He ended up in the bunker.
"Officer, don’t arrest me, she said she was 5 in dog years!"
Teddy’s got a man in his Fanny.
I looked so deep in the dark web, I started to see Tyrone.
Magician: "I am the greatest magician in the whole world. Look, now you see the rabbit in the hat, and now it is gone!"
Redneck girl: "That's nothing. My dad is the greatest magician! He disappears for a whole year and reappears at Christmas for a couple of hours!"
What does a blind kid and an orphan have in common?
They can’t see their parents.
What hit the ground first in a tree, a leaf or an emo kid?
The leaf, because an emo kid got a rope to save him!
I heard the Kardashians were going on a cruise soon.
As if there's not already enough plastic in the ocean.
What do lesbians love to use in art class?
Scissors.