Inch jokes

Woman: I want a man who is 6 feet and 6 inches.

Man: Is 6 feet and 6 inches one thing or two?

Woman: Two, I want a man who is 6 feet and also is 6 inches.

Man: Shit!

Did you know Yao Ming has the biggest penis in Chinese history? It measured in at nearly 5 inches!

Texans: Don't mess with Texas.

*snows 1 inch*

Texans: Please help us, President Biden!

What's thick, 12 inches, and in your mum's throat?

My penis.

What's about 12 inches long, has a purple head, and can make women scream all night?

Cot death.

What’s twelve inches and white?

Nothing.

What did the terrorist say to the 72 virgins?

"Just so you know, 5 inches is REALLY big!"

Store owner: You have to be 40 inches tall to go into the adult section.

Kid: Please.

Store owner: Oh okay, but get on your tippy toes.

Kid: Everybody is hugging.

What do you do if a woman is choking? Pull out a few inches.

What's the definition of a bastard?

Answer: A man with a 1 inch dick and a 10 inch tongue and all he wants to do is fuck!

Why can't your nose be twelve inches?

Because then it would be a foot.

Me: God, Bryce, do we really have to talk about this again?

Bryce: What?

Me: You're still talking shit!! I already told you! It's 9 inches! Stop saying it's 3!

P.S. I'm a girl.

Guess what.

What?

Your mum saw your 1 inch.

What’s 8 inches and women scream when they see it?

A puppy, you dirty monkey!

Three guys walk into a bar: one Asian, one American, one Black.

A girl walks in and says if all three of your D*** sizes don't add up to 12 inches, I will shoot you.

First comes the American with 3 inches, then the Black man with 8.

It totals out to 11 and they look at the Asian and say "Oh no."

He comes to 1 inch to top off the twelve.

She walks away and says ok.

The Asian says, "You're lucky she was hot, so I had a boner!"

What has 2 arms, 2 legs, 2 eyes, 2 breasts for milking, and a hole to fill with my 9 inches?

A sexy female.

"Mine is 3 inches."

"That's not very lo..."

"From the ground."

What is Jesus' favorite band?

Nine Inch Nails.

My girlfriend said, "GIMME EIGHT INCHES AND MAKE IT HURT!"

So I pumped my dick in her 4 times and hit her in the head with a brick.

What is 6 inches long and makes women scream? Stillbirth...