Im Jokes

if someone calls you dirty minded just say

You are dirty minded as well if you understand what im saying

My boss said she would’ve loved to meet bill Cosby as a child. I don’t get why im getting arrested, I was just making sure he dream came true

I have so many orphan jokes im afraid most of them wont hit home.

a man was walking with a young boy in the woods. the boy looks at the man and says "mister, its too dark and im getting scared." the man replies with, "how do u think i feel? i have to come back alone."

Well if someone ever calls u gay 🌈🏳️‍🌈 just say well atleast im straiter then the pole your mommy dances on 🤣🖕

Trying to make jokes in 2020- 2021 be like:

Comedian : When she went infront of the tv it took an hour till you can see the screen again.

Adiance : Why you gotta be so offensive

Comedian : Im not tr-

Aidiance : Oh so now your trying to debate?

Comedian : I-

Adiance : Now your acting racist?!

There were three guys stranded on a desert island. Each were granted one wish by a genie that found them. The first guy said "i wish to go back home." The second guy says the same, and the third guy said, "im lonely i wish my friends were back here."

Little Johnny was in class and his teacher asked "how many of you guys are trump fans?" since the entire class wanted to be liked by the teacher, they all raised their hands. Well except little Johnny. So the teacher asks, "why are you being different again Johnny....." so little Johnny says "well because im a democrat. My mom is a democrat and my dad is a democrat, so im a democrat!" so then the teacher responds with "well what if your mom was a moron and your dad was an idiot what would that make you?" well little Johnny says, "a trump fan!"

i told my mom that i have a crush she replied with: "so u like girls" i said: "uhm no no no " BUT im lesbian someone help how do i tell her without her hitting me with a belt??

ha! it asked me submit a joke but then i realized im the joke

What do you call an autistic person? Names.

Im autistic myself so dont go crying in my comment section.

pregnant teen: im pregnant my mums gonna kill me. Unborn baby: my mums gonna kill me

I called prank called someone saying SON! ITS ME SON! IM COMING FOR YOU!!! my friend next to me asked who i was calling and I said the orphanage

me: im home ma heres her with a new dad her: go hang wit someone :me gets the noose goes to fav tree i love you ma 🙂

Q.if i go 1 on 1 with Harvey weinstein i wont get raped A. im not a 14 yr old girl

Roses are red,Violets are blue,my heart is dead,im such a fool. -Juice Wrld

Im treated like god when im home, im usually ignored until someone wants something.

Today i find out that my cat got hit by a car accident, wellp i guess im gonna play ninja fruits on my hands again, Its not like anyone will notice.

a man died and went to heaven. here he met jesus. there were two clocks, the man asked whats with the clocks?. jesus answered this is mother theresa's clock she has not lied so the clock hasnt moved, this is abraham lincoln's clock; he's only lied twice so its moved twice. where's donald trumps the man asked. jesus replied: its in my office im using it as a ceiling fan.