If jokes
If I wanted to hear beeping, I wouldn’t have pulled my grandma’s cord to live.
My girlfriend is so stupid, she asked me if I wanted to shower with her to save money on our water bill, while we were staying at a hotel where we didn't even have to pay the water bill.
My boyfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of his Honda Civic, but I refused. If I’m going to have sex, it’s going to be on my own Accord.
My science teacher was talking about natural selection.
At one point, she asked me to name the first person to theorize about it. I said, "Eric Harris." It was on his shirt.
If you don't get the joke, look up "Eric Harris natural selection."
Went home with a woman last night. I was greeted at the door by a Mongrel.
I say Mongrel, it was her Down syndrome son trying to process if I was a stranger or not.
If you're seeing this, this is your sign to go fuck yourself.
Maybe if you get a better hairline, your dad will come back with the milk.
Her name was Lola.
She was a loner.
At the Copa.
Then I saw her,
And I got a boner.
The next morning,
She couldn't remember if I banged her.
I asked my French mate if he had a games console. He said, "Oui!"
My Mom said she's going to kill me if I don't stop using my computer.
Like if you think Joel was a hero for saving Ellie instead of saving the world.
Listen, my brothers, if you see a photo of her with another person,
Just go to her house and shoot her with your AK47.
If I died and went to heaven, do you think I’d be friends with Prince?
The only thing that makes me want to stay alive more is the thought that Prince would hate me.
If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands!
The amputee: -_-
If you think your life is bad, then people are discussing the gender of Mr. Potato Head.
If you have a pair and it runs around the street, what do you call it? A running pair.
Did you know penguins can fly if you throw them hard enough? Just like children!
If you make a joke about me, I'll tell my mom.
If y'all look up freshfry jokes, I'll come up. About a year ago, I had a bunch of friends on this app.
If my mom decides to get Chick-fil-A for dinner, and when I decide to eat my family for dinner, is that called cannibalism?