If jokes

Maybe if you get a better hairline, your dad will come back with the milk.

If my mom decides to get Chick-fil-A for dinner, and when I decide to eat my family for dinner, is that called cannibalism?

If you're seeing this, this is your sign to go fuck yourself.

Yo hairline so far, that if you put tables on it, it would NEVER end.

If you make a joke about me, I'll tell my mom.

If y'all look up freshfry jokes, I'll come up. About a year ago, I had a bunch of friends on this app.

If Jonny ate 29 out of 30 chocolate bars what would he have? Diabetus. Jonny would have diabetus.

If you have a pair and it runs around the street, what do you call it? A running pair.

If I had a dime for everytime the Australian president shat himself in a McDonald's, I would have one dime, which is not a lot, but it's weird that it happened.

Her name was Lola.

She was a loner.

At the Copa.

Then I saw her,

And I got a boner.

The next morning,

She couldn't remember if I banged her.

I asked my French mate if he had a games console. He said, "Oui!"

Why is 19 afraid?

Because if you add 400 to it, it’ll be next to 420.

You can tell if a woman is angry if she is holding a gun.

If I wanted to hear beeping, I wouldn’t have pulled my grandma’s cord to live.

My Mom said she's going to kill me if I don't stop using my computer.

If Mississippi bought Virginia a New Jersey, what would Delaware?

Idaho... Alaska!

"This is the dude who assassinated JFK."

"If you got a question, just shoot!"

Roses are red, violets are not lime, if you turn around, I will fist you anytime.

There was a guy who got his whole left side shot off.

When he was at the hospital and he woke up, he asked the doctor if he was okay.

The doctor said, "You're all right now."

Say my name if you like "Breaking Bad."