Hygiene jokes
Why do athletes cool down fast? Because they have fans.
Wash your hands.
I have to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.
What is the difference between a hipster and a hockey player?
A hockey player showers.
Fraser smells.
Why can't the toilet paper be cheeky?
It's between cheeks at the moment.
Singing in the shower is fun, until you get soap in your mouth.
Then it's a soap opera.
Why was the homeless lady only wearing one sock?
She started her period.
If you're gonna razor yourself, you might as well have shaving cream.
Why is your mom's butt so smelly? Cause she wipes poorly.
Why is Helen Keller's snatch always sore?
She wipes with a Brillo pad.
My friend is gonna release an air strike. There has to be at least 20 confirmed toilet kills.
A guy is walking down the street when he almost steps in something. He looks down and says, "Looks like shit."
He crouches down and smells it, "Smells like shit."
He sticks his finger in, tastes it, "Tastes like shit."
He then smiles and says, "Well, good thing I didn't step on it!"
I wish you were a soap, because I want you all over me.
You smell!
What did the nose say to the finger?
"Stop picking me!"
How can you tell a woman's pussy is good?
You smell her fingers.
My water was leaking, so I used Flex Tape. Now I don't know where to shower.
Q. What’s white, sticky, and better to spit than to swallow?
A. Toothpaste.
I saw some toilet paper rolls rolling in the wind.
So I called, "Toilet Papers Rolling In!"
Why are orphans always on the toilet?
Because they don't have anyone to give them some toilet paper!