Hygiene Jokes

ISIS recently brought out a new shampoo.

Head and Shoulders!

The way you are so ugly your parents even regret the day you were born.

The way you are so black when your mom is bathing you in the dark, she has to put flour in the water to see you.

🤣🤣🤣

I bet when you take a bath, they give you the whole pool. No, better yet, the ocean!

Why is Jonnyy baiiiiii sad? Because he no shower pero.

Pop in the toilet.

The image is a four panel comic. In the first panel, an ant is shown happily eating a crumb, thinking "Man, these are the best crumbs I've ever had!!" In the second panel, a man looks shocked, exclaiming "Ayoo dude no wayy!!" In the third panel, the man is holding up a sock with white fluid on it, saying, "I thought I lost this cum sock ages ago!!" The fourth panel shows a close-up of the ant, now with a disgusted expression.

I wish you were a soap, because I want you all over me.

Yo mama so nasty, she gave yo daddy head, then gave you a kiss good night.

Q: What do you call a clean idiot?

A: Soap on a Dope.

Why was the washing machine laughing?

It was taking the piss out of the knickers!

How do you make a tissue dance?

Put a boogie in it!

Why did the rapper take a bath before his concert?

To get his flow SQUEAKY CLEAN!

Yo mama's so fat, when she wants to take a bath, they need to make more H2O.

My guy: I have a Q-Tip.

Me: You can Q my tip.

My guy: Ayo!

ISIS recently brought out their own shampoo: HEAD AND SOLDIERS.

I got knob cheesed after your sexy mom was on top, dry humping me on the vanilla-coloured living room carpet.

I pooped in a bottle and stuck my finger through it.

I took some of the boo boo out, licked it, and rubbed it on a wall, making a BOO BOO portal. I jumped into it and I saw BOO BOO LAND. I rolled all in the chunk poop and drank the diarrhea.

Why did orphans have to drink their own piss?

Because last time they went to the bar, they went with their dad and drank some Corona, then got drunk and started eating someone's toenails, so his dad went to go get the milk and everybody had to evacuate the bar. Then the orphan started walking on his teeth and got listed for the top ten wanted animals in the world, so then he felt wanted and went to go home and had nobody to go to, so he found the beer bottle he drunk out of and started pissing in it so he wouldn't die and loved it. So then someone saw him in the bushes pissing in a beer bottle then drinking, so the person who saw him started recording and posted it on YouTube, and the boy became famous, so now he can feel like he was wanted in life after daddy went to go get the milk, then the little boy became really rich.