Hygiene jokes
You look like the 0.01 percent of bacteria the Lysol didn't kill.
You look like the 0.01 percent of germs the Lysol didn't kill.
At least if you're fat you don't need to put as much bathwater in the bath.
My brother thinks he's cool when he just SMELLS.
When you're at school and you have to wipe your ass, but it's only one ply...
Your finger breaks through... mmm, finger lickin' good.
You're the type of person to wash your hands after a shower.
New Windex ad:
You should get Windex for that dirty mind!
What's white and sticky?
Toothpaste.
Have you ever tried anal bleaching?
It really helps assholes lighten up.
How do you recycle a condom? Turn it inside out and shake the f *ck out of it!
"Have you taken a bath?"
"No. Why, did one go missing?"
Why do balls be hairy? Cause they stinky!
How do I get out of the toilet seat? Help me, please. I'm very stuck!
Q: What do you call a nun in a pool? A: A bath bomb.
What’s the difference between a prostitute and a hockey player?
A hockey player gets to shower after three periods.
If you get out of the shower clean, how does your towel get dirty?
"Jiggle balls, jiggle balls, jiggle all the way."
"Dr. Squatch will heal the itch, and know it goes away, hey!"
What can you do if you have a rotten piece of candy?
Would you rather:
Fight Mike Tyson
Or
Lick an elephant's butt after it took a crap with diarrhea?
Would you rather eat a girl out who has: herpes, COVID, and AIDS while she is on her period?
Or eat live worms, bats, and mice?