What does the starship Enterprise & toilet paper have in common?
Answer: They both circle Ur-Anus looking for Kling-Ons!
Why can't the toilet paper be cheeky?
It's between cheeks at the moment.
Did you know toilets, while you're at work, eat your toilet paper?
What did the poop say to the toilet paper? “You’re on a roll!”
Why do athletes cool down fast? Because they have fans.
Wash your hands.
What time is it when you need to go to the toilet?
Two-ply!
I ain't shaking anyone's hand, not because of the Coronavirus... I ain't shaking anyone's hand because y'all out of toilet paper!
Toothbrush says, "I have the worst job ever."
Toilet paper says, "You think your job is shitty."
How can toilet paper decorate your house?
Shit sticks everywhere.
I got in touch with my inner self today, it's the last time I use 1-ply toilet roll.
I see how it is y’all be buying toilet paper, stocking up from the Coronavirus, but where on the symptoms does it say diarrhea? Lol, why y’all be buying toilet paper, now I am just confused.
Yo momma so stupid, she pooped in the shower.
Poooooooooooooooooooooop!
Why did the poop cross the street? Because it was trying to get in the toilet.
Kid: Licks money.
Mom: Hey, don’t lick the money. It is dirty.
Kid: Is that why they call people filthy rich?
Why did the guy take a bath? Because he came, and it was too much of a mess.
What's the difference between broccoli and a booger?
Kids won't eat broccoli.
What time do babies get dirty?
Playtime.
Why was the astronaut washing her hands?
She was getting ready to eat launch.
Badass Toilet Paper Company: We don't take shit off of anyone.
