Toilet Seat jokes

What happened to the fly on the toilet seat?

It got pissed off.

Your mum is so fat that when she sat on the toilet, she couldn't because her fat ass can't fit on the toilet seat.

How do I get out of the toilet seat? Help me, please. I'm very stuck!

Two to the one from the one to the three, I like good pussy and I like good trees, Smoke so much weed you wouldn't believe, And I get more ass than a toilet seat.

Three to the one from the one to the three, I met a bad bitch last night in the D, Let me tell you how I made her leave with me, Conversation and Hennessey.

I've been to the motherfuckin' mountain top, Heard motherfuckers talk, seen and dropped, If I ain't got a weapon I'ma pick up a rock, And when I bust yo ass I'ma continue to rock.

Getcha ass of the wall with your two left feet, It's real easy just follow the beat, Don't let that fine girl pass you by, Look real close 'cause strobe lights blind.

Someone stole my toilet, and the police have nothing to go on.

What's the same with a toilet and anal sex? Your ass gets numb after a while.

Is it just me, or when you wipe your ass too deep, it reminds you of your uncle? Just me?

Ran out of toilet paper, so had to start using lettuce leaves... today was the tip of the iceberg.

Badass Toilet Paper Company: We don't take shit off of anyone.