Humor

what do you call a cow that fell?

Ground beef.

Did you hear the joke about the baby with cancer? It never gets old.

What do vegetarian zombies eat?

Graaaaiins.

KFC doesn't mean Kentucky Fried Chicken, it means "Kill Fat Children."

What did momma seal name her twin girls?

Luceal and Sealia.

What's the difference between a salad and a baby? People don't usually scream when you shake around a salad.

What's the fastest thing on earth?

An Ethiopian with a McDonald's Voucher.

How many people does it take to change a lightbulb underwater? The results are shocking!

Teacher: "You know you can't sleep in my class."

Boy: "I know. Maybe if you were a little quieter, I could."

ADHD stands for Attention Deficit Hey Donut.

Did you know the "f" in "orphan" stands for family because there is no "f" in orphan.

Bro, I'm so gay I can't even spell straight.

The worst thing about an owl is how they can maintain eye contact when you put them in a microwave.

Yo mama so big, her belt size said "equator."

Maybe we should stop talking about orphans, their parents will get ma... oh wait.

Dirty Joke: A boy fell in the mud.

Clean Joke: He took a bath with bubbles.

Dirty Joke: Bubbles was the girl next door.

You failed Helen Keller's speech class? It's okay, she's not a very good speaker.

What is brown and sticky?

What is white and gooey?

What is long and hard?

(Tell me in the comments)

What is big, black, and hairy? It's a gorilla with a machine gun.

Brian was shopping at a mall. He hopped onto an escalator. Next to him were two people having an argument. Eventually, one of them pulled out a pocket knife threatening to stab the other. Brian murmured "Well, that escalated quickly..."