Humor

Everything is made in China, except babies... They are made in Vachina.

Your hairline is so long that when you finally found the length of it, you told someone and they said, "Don't give me your phone number."

When you accidentally make your joke too dirty and get in shit from Explain Bear.

You're so tall you can go see God, but you're so tall your balls got small.

This ain't a joke, but the Twin Towers said their favorite number is 911.

All these suicide jokes are f***ing killing me.

I tried to tell an Armenian genocide joke in Istanbul.

Nobody got it.

When is a rapist safe around children?

When his plans are oven ready.

My name is Mr. Cheese, but your jokes are cheesier than me!

"My wife is so crazy," said Beatem's McSmasher.

"Why?" asked his buddy Don Caretomarch.

"She's sitting on the front verandah packing my shit in boxes!"

"You getting kicked out, bro?"

"Yeah, all I did was break every plate in the house over her head. Some people have no sense of humor."

"Is she one of them woke bitches?"

What do you do when a woman is choking?

Back up a couple inches.

What is a chicken's favorite day of the week? Fri-day.

So, I was in the bathroom at school washing up, and this girl walked out of the stall and she was like, "Hey, can you make me laugh? I have been having a pretty bad day." And I was like, "Sure." I was like, "Come here." So she came over to me. I was like, "Girl, look at yourself in the mirror." And she started laughing so hard, and she said, "I'm so ugly."

All of you guys in this orphanage are ABCDEFGHIJK.

What's that? said the orphans.

Attractive, brilliant, cute, darling, elegant, funny, gorgeous, and hot.

What's the IJK?

I'm just kidding! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

What's the hardest thing when working with the severely mentally handicapped?

My dick.

I saw a little boy sitting on a curb wearing rags.

I said: "Aww, are you an orphan?"

And he responded with "Yeah. What gave me away?"

And I said: "Your parents."

What do you call it when you rickroll someone in the LGBTQ?

You just got fruit-rolled.

What is the difference between a kid with cancer and dark humor?

Dark humor never dies!

In India, 3 things are wide and far everywhere, but no one admits: racism, sexism, and Sunny's jism.

What has two wings and a halo?

A Chinese telephone. (Wing, wing, halo.)