Wheelchair

One day I was jogging through the park and I saw this lady sitting next to a pond in a wheelchair with no legs and arms and said "Why are you crying" she said she had never been hugged I gave her a hug and jogged away.The next day i saw her again and asked her the same question she said "I've never been kissed" I gave her a kiss and went, The third day i asked her thrice and she said I've never been fucked I picked her up from her wheelchair and throwed her in the pond and said your fucked now She didn't make it:)

Nut

What do you call a nut on a wheelchair?....A busted nut.

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  • Memes

    Marijuana

    Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high, pulled down his fly, and said, "Jill do you wanna?" Jill said yes, pulled up her dress, and then they had some fun. But stupid Jill forgot the pill so now they have a son.

    Depression

    A girl and her brother are walking in their garden. POV: Brother. Sister: "Why are you cutting those flowers?"

    Brother: "Because they're beautiful!"

    Sister: "I thought you said you cut yourself because you aren't."

    Brother:......

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  • Emo

    Why do emos like yo-yo's? Cos they get strangled by the string.

    Dog

    What do you call a dog with no legs?

    My asian neighbors dinner.

    Room

    A pun walked into a room and killed ten people.

    Pun in, ten dead.

    Girlfriend

    My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, "No, wait! I can change."

    Soda

    I just quit my job at a can crushing factory.

    It was soda-pressing.

    Friend

    I told my friend ten puns to see what one made him laugh. No pun in ten did.

    Cigarette

    Three men are on a boat. They have four cigarettes, but nothing to light them with. So, they throw a cigarette overboard and the whole boat becomes a cigarette lighter.

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  • Pedophile

    A white dad, a priest, and a rabbi all run out a burning school, and the dad says, “What about the kids?” and the rabbi replies to him saying, “Fuck the kids,” and the priest says, “Think we got enough time?”

    Brother

    What do you call a redneck sister who runs faster than her brothers?

    A virgin.

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