Humor
What do you get when you cross jokes and cum?
CUMedy.
What's the difference between an Afghan kindergarten and a military target?
The drone guy didn't know either.
Why is 6 afraid of 7?
It’s not. Numbers aren’t sentient and are therefore incapable of feeling fear.
Me: Are you an orphan?
Boy: Yeah, what gave me away?
Me: ....ur parents.
What do jokesters eat for breakfast? Pun-cakes.
Memes
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite meal?
His shoulder.
Jack and Jill Went up the hill to have some hanky panky.
Silly Jill forgot her pill. And now there's little Franky.
What's worse than waking up with a penis drawn on your face?
Finding out it was traced.
How do you know when a woman is going to have a black baby?
When she takes the tampon out, all the cotton is picked.
Husband: "I bet you can't say something that will make me both happy and sad at the same time."
Wife: "You have the biggest penis out of all your friends."
What did one butt cheek say to the other? “Between you and me, it stinks in here!”
I am disabled and I find these jokes appropriately hilarious.
What's a skeleton's favorite plant? A bone-zai tree. But if they don't like that one, how about a s-pine tree?
What does a skeleton order at a restaurant?
Spareribs!
Vagina jokes aren't funny.
Most of the time.
Man, choking on sugar seems like the sweetest way to die.
What does a cow say when he remembers something?
"I have deja moo!"
What is red and tan and spins for about 50 mph?
A baby in a blender.
What is the Harry Potter spell that aborts babies?
Fetus Deletus!
I just quit my job at a can crushing factory.
It was soda-pressing.