
Humor
Your forehead is so big, Megamind thought he was your long lost sibling.
Did you hear about the woman who put her husband’s ashes in a burrito?
He gets to tear that ass up one more time.
Scan my wrist for 75% off!
What was the incontinent farmer's greatest problem? He managed his carrot patch but couldn't control his peas!
Why is it hard to break up with a Japanese girl?
Because you have to drop the bomb twice for her to get it.
Your Mama so fat, when she fell on the sidewalk, nobody laughed but the sidewalk cracked up.
Orphans are human, too! They just don't know who their parents are or where! I know four sisters named Mariah, Kariah, Lariah, and Iariah and they said they are orphans, too! And they are sad and they don't like your jokes!
Ok, now I'm not good at telling jokes, but this one is not too bad. One cunt said to another cunt, "Do you get cold at night?"
"Fuck no, cunt," the first cunt said, "Why?"
"I have a built-in set of vertical curtains to keep the cold out, cunt!" xx
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Abby.
Abby who?
Abby C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z.
What day does Venus like?
SATURNday.
My bumper sticker says: "👋FORMER BABY ON BOARD."
Chuck: That's my sister, mister, and I'm gonna save her!
Red: snooore, snoooore
Silver: *straining to get outta buff eagle's grip*
Chuck: *goes super sonic speed and breaks outfit*
Chuck VS RED
Both LOSE!
What did Daveon say when he saw a spider? "I'm Dave-on with this!"
Friend: Your t-shirt is cringe.
Me: You should go get the Covid test because one of their symptoms is no taste.
What do you call an Indian man stuck in a tree?
A leaf.
What does it mean when a man sits on a boulder instead of on the ground?
A bolder choice.
Do you like my a-corn-y jokes?
So, a neutron went to a bar. He asked the bartender how much for a beer. The bartender said, "For you, no charge."
If someone is bullying you for being fat, remember, you're the bigger person, a MUCH bigger person.
What's the biggest joke ever? Gender equality.
