Humor
A girl and her brother are walking in their garden. POV: Brother. Sister: "Why are you cutting those flowers?"
Brother: "Because they're beautiful!"
Sister: "I thought you said you cut yourself because you aren't."
Brother:......
No matter how much I love cake...
I would never dessert you.
A pun walked into a room and killed ten people.
Pun in, ten dead.
What did the sex offender frog say to the other sex offender frog when a hot frog passed them?
Rrrrrapeit!
I would tell a scoliosis joke.
But that would be completely out of line.
Why do emos like yo-yo's? Cos they get strangled by the string.
I told my friend ten puns to see what one made him laugh. No pun in ten did.
Three men are on a boat. They have four cigarettes, but nothing to light them with. So, they throw a cigarette overboard and the whole boat becomes a cigarette lighter.
What's the difference between meat and fish?
If you beat your fish, it'll die.
A skeleton goes sky diving. Doesn't come back in one piece.
What's in a Michael Jackson hotdog?
A 50-year-old piece of meat.
A 12-year-old bun.
Emo jokes are not funny, so cut it out.
My sister's name is Coco, and one day she was funny, so I told her, "You coconut."
I thought my wife was joking when she said she was gonna leave me because I wouldn’t stop singing “I'm a believer,” but then I saw her face.
One day I was jogging through the park and I saw this lady sitting next to a pond in a wheelchair with no legs and arms and said "Why are you crying" she said she had never been hugged I gave her a hug and jogged away.The next day i saw her again and asked her the same question she said "I've never been kissed" I gave her a kiss and went, The third day i asked her thrice and she said I've never been fucked I picked her up from her wheelchair and throwed her in the pond and said your fucked now She didn't make it:)
Unlike my syndrome, I keep my chin up. 🙌🏽😁
Roses are red, Violets are red, Sunflowers are red,
HOLY SHIT, MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!
What's the difference between dark humor and morbid humor?
Dark humor is 10 babies in a trash can. Morbid humor is 1 baby in 10 trash cans.
What do you call a sex offender attending church? A priest.
What do you call a boomerang that does not come back?
An orphan's parents.