Humor
Yo mama is so dumb, she plays Pokémon and doesn’t catch any.
"Roses are red, Shut up and go to bed!"
A husband and wife get into a fight. The wife says, "Go blow off some steam. I’ll let you fuck a hooker." So he does that, comes back, and says, "I’m off the hook now!"
Deez nuts eat nuts.
Prankster pranks.
Fake lobster in the toilet. 8:00 a.m.
Prank phone calls. 9:00 a.m.
Mommy, mommy, why do I keep running around in circles?
Shut up, or I'll nail your other foot to the floor!
This video got me on the ground. 😂
Https://youtu.be/7AdpKigXyyA
Why is death taken so lightly? It's terrible how people use it! (This is NOT a joke!)
Orphan jokes are funny to explore, especially with the family.
What did the fork say to the cake when he said, "I hope you get eaten?"
Fork off!
Where did your dad go? Because I saw him at the milk shop. Oh wait, there isn't one.
I was dying when I called my sister and she said, "Hi, this is Pepperoni's pizza and abortion clinic; your loss, our sauce. How may I help you today?"
Who is the coolest vegetable?
Rad-ish, of course!
There are 2 dads and 2 sons. They all caught a fish.
Why did they only come home with 3 fish?
(Answer)
There were a grand-dad, dad, and son.
If you don't get it, then it means grand father is the dad to the dad (1 dad). Dad is the dad for the son and a son for the grandfather. Get it?
Here via westwingman.net from Veep!
Time for a random Terraria joke.
Q: Why did the guide die at his house?
A: The player dropped his doll in the lava.
(WALL OF FLESH HAS AWOKEN) :| Oh crap!
Q. What kind of school does an ice cream man go to?
A. Sunday school!
Psst! Don't understand? Well, "Sunday" sounds like "Sundae." Get it now? Nope? Sorry. Plus, it's an ice cream homophone joke.
Why was the people's wedding so miserable...
'Cause during the kiss someone farted so loud and stinky, they agreed to never try to have another wedding.
What has one head, one foot, and four legs? A: A bed.
Q: Did you hear the joke about the roof? A: Never mind, it's over your head!
Q: How many letters are in the alphabet? A: 11. A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T.
What did the boy banana say to the girl banana?
"Dang girl, you are so appealing!" 😙