Humor
What did the farmer say when he saw his chicken cross the road?
"No, my cock!"
What'd the farmer say when a coyote killed and ate his rooster?
"No, you ate my cock!"
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?
It depends on how hard you throw them.
It's fucked up how people make these jokes, and when orphans read them, it makes them feel worse about themselves. I should know, I'm an orphan.
I call this my great talk with Siri.
Me: Hey Siri, give me a "yo mama" joke.
Siri: My mother? Huh?
Me: Did I stutter?
Siri: Interesting question.
Me: It wasn’t a question.
Siri: I’m not sure I understand?
Me: You should understand.
Siri: Hmm... Is there something else I can help with?
Me: No, you b***.
Memes
Me when the
"Rajesh get on bus, so many people, squeeze here squeeze there. He daydream about naughty stuff, like coffee spill but not coffee. Bus move, stop, he press close to pretty lady, she smell nice. Rajesh think how funny if something else spill, make whole bus ride wild." He laugh to self, bus ride never boring now!
Wanna hear a joke?
My life.
How do Asian people name their children?
They throw a pan down the stairs.
What would your name be? Msg it to @chelsearosegraham.
When you accidentally make your joke too dirty and get in shit from Explain Bear.
What's the difference between a joke and a tragedy? Timing.
I can’t stand jokes about Germans.
They’re the wurst.
What is a woman's name with one leg?
Eileen.
Explain Bear teaches us that explaining the joke makes it a billion times funnier.
This is a joke in itself.
You. You're the joke.
This is not a joke.
Why did that fish cross the road?
Just for the halibut (hell of it)!
Dark humor is like water, some people get it, some people don’t.
Your forehead is so deep, not even curry can shoot from that deep.
Bro, gay jokes aren't even funny.
Like...
"Cum on guys."