Why are the same Sally jokes told over and over again?
Because how can you tell jokes about someone who's dead?
Humor
Our family is known for unusually sloppy diarrhea.
It runs in our jeans.
Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from Kernel Sanders.
Hehehe
Ligma.
Balls.
If I busted an egg on your head.... the yolk would be on you... ha ha ha!!!
What's yellow and blue and found at the bottom of a pool? A baby with slashed floaties.
Why did the bone go on a blind date? He was bonely.
What do you call a dog that's faced backwards?
A god.
Why did the skeleton not tell jokes? It lost its funny bone. Maybe you should try putting it back.
Did you hear about the guy who made knock-knock jokes? He won the Nobel Prize.
Me: Mom, I think I need to go to the hospital.
Mom: OMG, why son?
Me: I don't know what's wrong, but every time I close my eyes, I can see.
Think about it, then spread LMAO.
What do you call Nicholas and Dillon/Dennis?
GAY
Someone: Hey, are you a skeleton?
A skeleton: Of course, I have a SKELE-ton of fans!
Why is drinking soda so sad?
It's soda-pressing.
I'mma monch ur nan's feet at 3 am tonight, ngl.
What did the officer tell the lioness after she said she was a dog?
Oooooooooh girl, you lion!
Q. What do Kenny's dick and this joke have in common?
A. They're both really short.
Q: Why didn't Jeffery Dahmer eat comedians?
A: He thought they tasted funny.
One day, there were three people: a mom and two kids. One of the kids walks up and asks her mom why she was named Rose. Her mom told her that she ate a rose petal when she was born; that is why she was named Rose.
Then the second child walked up and yelled, "Ahhhhhh!" and the mom said, "Shut up, Billy Goat!"
So, this guy, right? He has been through the worst shit in his life. He lost his house, his car, his wife, his kids, everything except his dog.
About 2 weeks after he loses everything, he goes to apply for a job. He attends work for the first 2 weeks to get his first paycheck and then calls in sick for about a month. He comes back to his boss' office after the month is over and his boss questions him. The man claims, "Sir, I was blowing chunks." "What do you mean by 'blowing chunks'?" says the boss. The man replies with, "Chunks is the name of my dog..."
