Humor
What's the difference between a speed bump and a road kill?
About 40 mph.
Why does a blind man still have eyes?
So he can see that he can't see.
How to harass? Say it out loud but slowly. Split that word into, and it sounds like "her ass."
I bought a sweater and it started building up static electricity.
So I got another one free of charge.
What did the shirt say to the pants?
Belt.
What do you call a nerd in space?
A space nerd.
What does a blind man crying and an unplugged TV have in common?
Nothing can be seen when they get turned on.
Why is the blind kid popular?
He can't see the middle fingers.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
A dragon.
A dragon who?
The dragon gonna drag its balls across your face.
A friend took me out to his shed and was showing me all his tools, when he pointed to a ladder. "That's my step ladder," he said. "I never knew my real ladder."
What do the Twin Towers and a bad joke have in common? They never land well.
Your mom's so fat, when she stands on the scale, it says, "To be continued..."
Hi, I’m Joe.
Your hairline is so far back, when your forehead was playing tag, your hairline ran away real far.
If 7 8 9 why was ten scared?
It was right in the middle of 9/11.
This ain't a joke, but the Twin Towers said their favorite number is 911.
All these jokes are all plane.
Depresso Exspresso let's be friends, please.
Why do orphans have no sense of humor?
I guess they've never heard a dad joke.
"Your mother has been with us for 20 years," said John. "Isn’t it time she got a place of her own?"
"My mother?" replied Helen. "I thought she was your mother."