Humor
What do people that can only use half their face and wankers have in common?
They have both had a few strokes.
Two skeleton brothers are talking.
1st bro: "Hey, get up! You and do some exercise! You are so heavy, you weigh a ton!"
2nd bro: "A skele-TON :)"
My jokes are so dark that I am surprised that the cops didn't shoot them yet.
If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world.
I am trying to re-comment something that used to be on here, but is no longer on here.
Here are some rules to make a good joke:
1: Don't say “my life.”
2: Proofread your joke and make sure people can read it/have good grammar in it.
3: And don’t repost things (although this last one is hypocritical because this was me trying to repost something, but it is still a good rule to go by).
Why does everyone like couch jokes?
Because they are sofa-nny (so funny)!
The morbid jokes on this site.
My best friend got ligma. (Ah, did he? Sorry bro.) LIGMA BALLS!
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair that does comedy?
Sit down comedy.
These aren't funny.
If sex before marriage is a sin, is sex after marriage cos or tan?
If an old person tells you what to do just say, "At least my parents are alive!"
It's not incest if you're adopted.
Yo mama is so dumb, she plays Pokémon and doesn’t catch any.
I just wanted to say...
These disabled jokes are quite offensive. I'm not disabled in any way, but people reading might be affected in many ways. Yes, some of them are amusing, but there's a difference between having a joke and being plain rude.
Please take my feedback into account. Thanks!
If someone calls you, reply with this: “Hi, this is Dave’s orphanage and pizzeria, where yesterday’s loss is today’s sauce! How may I assist you today?”
I like my woman like I like my coffee: in a big sack on top of a donkey.
What did the sex offender frog say to the other sex offender frog when a hot frog passed them?
Rrrrrapeit!
Why should you always knock on the fridge door before opening it? In case there's a salad dressing.
Somebody stole my joke.
So I stole their spinal cord.