Why can't orphans see all these jokes on this website that we're posting?
'Cause they don't know where the home page is.
Humor
I bullied a handicap today.
What is he gonna do? Stand up for himself?
If sex before marriage is a sin, is sex after marriage cos or tan?
Last Christmas, I took a picture of your mom.
It's still printing.
Why are eggs bad at puns?
They always mix up their yolks!
What's the difference between a cop car and a hedgehog?
With a cop car, all the pricks are on the inside.
Let me tell you how I escaped Iraq. Iran! (;)
I was trying to make friends, and this one person came up to me. They said, "Lettuce be friends?" I just laughed and said that was tear-able.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lick-alot-a-puss.
There are two cows in a field. One says to the other, "I'm cold. Are you cold?"
The other cow says, "Yeah, I'm Fresian."
What do you call an overweight psychic?
A four chin teller.
We spend the weekend getting the poop out!
"Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Bone."
"Bone who?"
"It's nice to meet cha'. Can we be friends? I'm bone-ly here."
How did the skeleton know it was gonna rain?
If you said he felt it in his bones, you're wrong. He watched the weather forecast.
What did the blind man say on Christmas?
"I can feel your presents!"
Guy feels something on his back.
“Oh God, please let that be a rifle.”
“Nope. I’m just real happy to see you.”
What did the sushi say to the bee?
"Wasuuubi!"
Yesterday I asked my friend, "What is a fish without eyes?"
They replied, "I don’t know."
I said, "Fsh."
What did the man's dick say to the man?
I just can't "hand"le it!
Stephen Hawking isn't actually dead. He is just having an update.
