Humor

It's funny dating someone smarter than you. My girlfriend knows how to push my buttons but never takes into account what a dick I can be if need be. Let me explain. Say, for example, she calls me retarded, I remind her that she's dating me.

Why did Technoblade die?

'Cause he wanted to Skyblock in Heaven!

So, unfortunately, I got kicked out of the library again because, for some reason, they say that books on women's rights don't go in the fantasy section.

How do Chinese people name their babies?

They chuck a pan down the stairs.

Your hairline is so far back that Green Lantern became Blue Torch.

Kobe: Stop doing dark humor!

Me: Why? They don't land well together?

If they made a movie about your sex life, what would it be?

In Afghanistan, it would be "Twelve Years a Slave!" 🤣

What does a woman’s pussy and a chainsaw have in common?

Miss by a few inches and you’re in deep shit.

My friend said I was gay, but then I realised he was talking to the mirror.

What do you call a person in a wheelchair?

Virgin Mobile.

One time the dog got bit by a snake, so my dad had to shoot it. My dad said to me, "This is what's going to happen to your little brother." "What little brother?" Exactly.

What do you call a chicken staring at a pile of lettuce?

A chicken sees a salad.

(Say it out loud if you don't get it!)

Orphan joke club Discord coming soon.

What do you call a disabled kid who is blind?

A grape chilli bean.

I remember the time that Gordon Ramsay did an African food episode... it was a short episode. Too bad he couldn’t find any.

Why can't orphans see all these jokes on this website that we're posting?

'Cause they don't know where the home page is.

I bullied a handicap today.

What is he gonna do? Stand up for himself?

Warning: if you don't like gummy bears, DO NOT READ.

Q: What do you call a Mexican gummy bear?

A: Delici-Oso

Last Christmas, I took a picture of your mom.

It's still printing.

What did the sushi say to the bee?

"Wasuuubi!"