Humor

What do parents and dark humor have in common? Some get it, and some don't.

Did you hear the joke about the baby with cancer? It never gets old.

If you say "slay" in my comments I will follow all of you lmao who are signed in.

You can't spell "Funeral" without "fun."

What did one skeleton say to the other?

Skeleton 1: "I need a hand!"

Skeleton 2: (Throws up hand)

Skeleton 1: "That wasn't very humerus."

Skeleton 2: "Why do you have to be so heartless?"

Skeleton 1: "At least I had the guts to tell you!"

What did the diver say when he was trapped in seaweed?

- Kelp!

What did Yoda say to Luke during his wedding ceremony?

"May divorce be with you."

I tried out some puns to make people laugh, but no pun in ten did.

I painted my dad white so he wouldn’t leave.

What's the difference between America and a flash drive?

One is USA, the other is USB. 😂😂😂

What do you say when you wake up to the police trying to arrest you?

“C'mon, did ya really think I’d resist arrest?”

A man once sued smart water for not making him smart. Then a woman replied, “Okay cool, now I’m going to go sue Thin Mints for not making me thin.”

Chode.

A puma was making another puma laugh. That puma that was laughing said, “Stop making me laugh! I’m gonna puma pants!”

I am always high, welcome to bipolar disorder. LMAO. (Don't bother to like or comment, I just had to say this.)

A guy walks into a bar with a .44 magnum and yells: "Who the fuck fucked my wife?"

Everybody is silent for a second, then the bartender said: "Mate, you ain't got enough bullets!"

Women be like, "Equal rights, equal pay," then decide that they don't want to do labor intensive jobs.

What do you call California during a forest fire?

Completely normal.

I, for one, give President Joe Biden my full support, and anything else he can find in my previously rented gym locker. 🤣

Women be like don't tell me what to wear, proceeds to tell men what to wear.