Embarrassing story jokes

I asked the doctor doing my prostate exam where I should put my pants. "Next to mine" was not the answer I was expecting.

The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick, but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn't talking to me.

I tried to explain to my 4 year old son that it's perfectly normal to accidentally poop your pants. But he's still making fun of me.

My dad posted a picture of his condom challenge fail to his social media - it was a picture of me.

So, I hooked up with a girl at a party, but I forgot that it was a family reunion.

(SWEET HOME ALABAMA STARTS PLAYING)