Humor
Why didn't the cows eat the lemon grass?
It made sour milk.
I could never fall out of a boat because I've already fallen for you.
What do you call a plane with no wings?
Sally.
What did the ass say to the joke?
"You crack me up!"
Jack and Jill went up the hill to start to build the still for Jill.
Jack stopped and said to drunkin' Jill, "To build this still will take so long."
Jill said to Jack, "Well, f--k the still and kiss my ass, and watch me take another pill!"
The teacher asked the class what they wanted to be when they grew up.
Johnny said when he grows up he's going to be a motherfucking hustler. He's going to have a wife and live in a big house in the country with maids and butlers and drive a Rolls-Royce, and he's also going to have an apartment in the city where his side bitch is going to live. He's going to buy her expensive jewelry, whatever she wants: cars, diamonds, clothes, shoes.
The teacher didn't know what to say, so she calls on Sally. "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
Sally said, "I want to be Johnny's bitch."
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lickalotofpuss.
What does the pedophile use for bait? Trix!
Why didn't the orphan cross the road? Where was he gonna go?
How do you fit a baby in a bowl? ... A blender... and how do you get it out?
Tortilla chips.
Incest is wincest. (That was above.)
Fun for the whole family!
Next of kin, count me in!
Why is Jenna Marbles so funny? She lost all her marbles.
I drew a fist on a body, and then I drew a guy saying to him, "That dude's a knucklehead!"
What planet has a butt? Uranus!
The woman saw a cute lookin' cop. She had pulled up right next to him and said, "Hey, can I get your number?" He said, "Yeah, it's 911," and drove off.
Why do dwarfs do drugs?
To get high.
Why is Mars red? Because it saw Uranus! 😂
"Your mother has been with us for 20 years," said John. "Isn’t it time she got a place of her own?"
"My mother?" replied Helen. "I thought she was your mother."
Yo mama so fat, Trump used her like a wall.
I walked up to some Arabs and said "Alawakba," then here came the second tower.