Humor

There are two muffins baking in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Phew, is it getting hot in here or is it just me?"

The other muffin says, "AAAAHHH!! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

Your mom is so fat when she skipped a meal, the whole stock market crashed.

Your mom is so fat she tripped, and I didn’t even laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.

Saw that shit on Roblox.

what's the difference between morbid humor & dark humor?

dark humor fits 10 people in 1 container.

morbid humor fits 1 person on ten containers.

Q: What kinda bees give milk?

A: Boobees.

I don't understand why people hate it when they hear a dad joke. They are actually pretty funny, and I will show you Y. (shows a picture of the letter Y)

What's green and smells like pork?

Kermit's fingers!

Touch your toes and hold them. Then spell "run." It will say, "r.u.n."

What's a cannibal's favorite snack?

Men toes! 😂🤣

Your hairline is so far gone that it looks like someone dropped a nuclear bomb on it.

You know, I like my girls how I like my 9/11: Two twins that go down easy.

Teacher: Stand up if you think you are stupid.

After a while, a student stands up.

Teacher: So you think you are stupid?

Student: No, I'm not stupid. I just felt bad because you were standing by yourself.

So, I was in the bathroom at school washing up, and this girl walked out of the stall and she was like, "Hey, can you make me laugh? I have been having a pretty bad day." And I was like, "Sure." I was like, "Come here." So she came over to me. I was like, "Girl, look at yourself in the mirror." And she started laughing so hard, and she said, "I'm so ugly."

Your friend walks up to you and shows you a picture of an overweight woman.

What would you rate this woman?

A 7.

Why?

Because 7 ate 9!

What do women and screen doors have in common? The more you bang them, the looser they get.

The emo tried to high five the tree, but the tree just left him hanging.

I threw a lamp at a depressed kid. I was just trying to brighten up his day.

This is coming from an Indian btw and I find it very racist and it all stereotypes.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, All the worse jokes come from you.

The first ever joke:

https://worstjokesever.com/jokes/52b8feb0514efb2cbf8ca375/what-is-the-second-hardest-thing-in-the-morning?

Your forehead is so big that it made Mona Lisa smile.