Humor
I was dying when I called my sister and she said, "Hi, this is Pepperoni's pizza and abortion clinic; your loss, our sauce. How may I help you today?"
My friend is blind.
So he always says he cannot Nazi.
Why didn't Stephen Hawking ever eat chicken wings? Because he didn't exist.
Why isn't Stephen Hawking going to heaven?
Because he's British.
what do you call a terrorist attack in india?
a wednesday.
A patient visiting his doctor asked him if he had ever laughed at a patient.
The doctor said, "I have never in 25 years of practice ever laughed at a patient."
Reassured, the patient drops his trousers and underpants.
Immediately the doctor burst out into loud raucous laughter when he sees that the patient has a penis the size of a cocktail sausage.
After about 10 minutes the doctor manages to get himself under control.
Swiftly apologising he says to the patient, "Sorry about that. How can I help you?"
The patient says, "Have you got any cream for it? It's swollen."
What happens to chickens that get kidnapped by rapists?
They get choked.
The world is a freaking rape joke.
I'm just here to say that I don't approve of political jokes.
I've seen too many of them get elected.
Where did your dad go? Because I saw him at the milk shop. Oh wait, there isn't one.
Wife: Honey! Do you like tea?
Husband: No, I like after "T"!
It means: the letter "U": you!
Cancer, it's just funny, hahaha.
The more downvotes it has, the better the joke.
September 11, bring your plane to work day.
I bullied a handicap today.
What is he gonna do? Stand up for himself?
What do you call a 3 humped camel?
Answer: a prostitute from New York. 😂😭💀
You're really...
Rape jokes are not funny.
Look at my name by the way😁.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
Because they thought they saw their parents. (Plot twist: the orphan got ran over.)
Mom told me drugs are my enemies.
Jesus said to like your enemies.
Yay, I can like drugs then!