Humor
Why didn't Stephen Hawking ever eat chicken wings? Because he didn't exist.
Why isn't Stephen Hawking going to heaven?
Because he's British.
what do you call a terrorist attack in india?
a wednesday.
A patient visiting his doctor asked him if he had ever laughed at a patient.
The doctor said, "I have never in 25 years of practice ever laughed at a patient."
Reassured, the patient drops his trousers and underpants.
Immediately the doctor burst out into loud raucous laughter when he sees that the patient has a penis the size of a cocktail sausage.
After about 10 minutes the doctor manages to get himself under control.
Swiftly apologising he says to the patient, "Sorry about that. How can I help you?"
The patient says, "Have you got any cream for it? It's swollen."
What happens to chickens that get kidnapped by rapists?
They get choked.
The world is a freaking rape joke.
I'm just here to say that I don't approve of political jokes.
I've seen too many of them get elected.
Where did your dad go? Because I saw him at the milk shop. Oh wait, there isn't one.
Wife: Honey! Do you like tea?
Husband: No, I like after "T"!
It means: the letter "U": you!
Cancer, it's just funny, hahaha.
The more downvotes it has, the better the joke.
September 11, bring your plane to work day.
I bullied a handicap today.
What is he gonna do? Stand up for himself?
What do you call a 3 humped camel?
Answer: a prostitute from New York. 😂😭💀
You're really...
Rape jokes are not funny.
Look at my name by the way😁.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
Because they thought they saw their parents. (Plot twist: the orphan got ran over.)
Mom told me drugs are my enemies.
Jesus said to like your enemies.
Yay, I can like drugs then!
How did Jesus kill himself?
He fell from his bike.
How many times did he die?
Once on a bike and once when he fell from a cloud in Heaven.
What did the cactus look like with his tuxedo on?
Sharp! 🤣