You wanna hear a suicide joke? Nvm, it didn't make it.
Humor
I painted my dad white so he wouldn’t leave.
What’s a Muslim’s favorite car?
A Citroën C4.
What is an orphan's favorite flower? Self-raising. 😂
Why did the orphan call her boyfriend "daddy"?
Because she wanted that D.
I just quit my job at a can crushing factory.
It was soda-pressing.
What's the difference between 5 cocks and a joke? I can't take a joke.
Two men were on a hike through a forest when one of the hikers got bit on his ass by a snake.
The other hiker ran to the village 2 miles away and explained to a doctor there what had happened. The doctor told him to cut a cross with a knife where he had been bitten and suck out the venom, so he ran back to the first hiker who asked him, "Have you got the cure?"
Hiker number two just said, "Nah mate, you're dead."
Only really smart people will get this without it being explained.
Toilet paper fight hat.
What do you call two redheads on Mars?
Locals.
How do you find a blind man at a nude beach?
It isn't hard.
What does a cannibal call a pregnant person?
A Kinder Surprise.
What are intelligent people in the US called?
"Tourist."
Stop making jokes about Kobe.
What did the boy banana say to the girl banana?
"Dang girl, you are so appealing!" 😙
If someone calls you dirty minded just say:
"You are dirty minded as well if you understand what I'm saying."
The best joke in the world is me.
Don't say that you're not a joke. Jokes have meanings.
Why doesn't China have a cricket team?
They always eat the bat.
I don’t like to tell school shooter jokes because they are usually aimed at a younger audience.
The only time rape jokes are funny is never.
