Hows jokes
I like my woman how I like my wine, just under 2 years old.
Which is redder: a baby or a red car? It depends on how the baby was killed!
How do skeletons get COVID?
From the coffin!
Have you ever had duck sausage? No? How about you duck on down and get yourself some!
What can a physically handicapped ♿ gay man 👬 do on his own very well 👏 without being taught how to do?
Perform fellatio on gay men.
Son: Dad, how was I born?
Dad: Your mum's a hoe.
Son: OK, what's a hoe?
Dad: Your mum.
Me and my wife love playing table tennis. I couldn’t win all day, but when it got dark, I managed to beat her. I don’t know how the police found out so quickly.
I was dying when I called my sister and she said, "Hi, this is Pepperoni's pizza and abortion clinic; your loss, our sauce. How may I help you today?"
Your forehead is so long, even Einstein didn’t know how to cross it.
How many times can you subtract ten from one thousand?
One; after that you're subtracting ten from 990.
Words can’t describe how beautiful you are.
But numbers can. (Lol)
Alright, I'm gonna drink the lo-carb one to see how it compares to the normal Monster.
Holy shit, it tastes just like the original one.
There's like a weird after taste though.
Kinda like a sparkling water one.
I love Monster. I've drank about 5 cans already.
Why is death taken so lightly? It's terrible how people use it! (This is NOT a joke!)
Dawn rises on the Serengeti, and she has no idea as to how she got there.
How to make the kissing in a tree recognizable: me and you k.i.s.s.i.n.g., tree sitting, wedding, love, then comes love, then comes baby in the carriage, then hate comes, divorce and purse.
FEW!!!!!!!
Uranus be like, "Oh look, I'm Uranus. Imagine how disgusted I feel."
Friend 1: How come when you say "apart" your lips move apart, but when you say "together" they move apart?
Me: Maybe your lips want a divorce.
Good morning, Gwen, how are you?
How do mountains get big?
They go trick-or-treating.
What has one head, one foot, and four legs? A: A bed.
Q: Did you hear the joke about the roof? A: Never mind, it's over your head!
Q: How many letters are in the alphabet? A: 11. A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T.