Hows jokes
How did they figure out what kind of shampoo Paul Walker used? They found his “head and shoulders” in the dash.
How did my dad know I was gay?
He stuck his cock in me and I liked it.
How do you kill Hellen Keller?
Take her on a walk off a cliff.
I like my woman how I like my wine, just under 2 years old.
How is your cereal? Oh, wait.
"Can we do 69?"
"How about we do 9/11 since we will crash together?"
The legs are soft and delicious.
How much can you earn in Selkan Toko Na Sinsel? Njpopularnijssa bronia jost. My grandma was already eto nasaba of the other sachan without me. Then you will be satisfied.
So you know how sheets are always so tight at hotels?
Well I looked under the bed and there is a freaking room cleaner holding the sheets. All he says is "Don't ask or you shall die!"
How do rappers stay warm in the winter?
They drop FIRE TRACKS.
A hot woman called "Jessie" was showering when the phone rang.
Jessie was upset because the phone wouldn't stop ringing, and she goes out naked from the bathroom to answer the phone in the hall.
Jessie on the phone: 《Hello? 》
The one on the phone: 《Oh hi, I'm Jeff, I just wanted to tell you don't go out from your bathroom naked next time because my brother is behind you right now trying to rape you.》
Jessie: 《Stop it my sister! This is the 10th time you do this cringe joke! It gets boring!》
But sadly it wasn't a joke, and she cried a lot that night and learned how not to go out naked from the bathroom again.
How do crabs honor their mom’s birthday? The shell-abrate.
How do you execute a retard?
The Electric Wheelchair.
My dad told me that his dreams were shattered a few years ago.
Then I asked him how many years ago.
He replied with, "When were you born?"
The worst thing about an owl is how they can maintain eye contact when you put them in a microwave.
There are three people on the steps of Heaven. God tells them all he is having a good day and if they make him laugh by telling him how they died, he will let them in.
The first one said, "I just finished a long day of work and I get home, and right as I stepped in, I knew my wife was cheating on me. I searched everywhere and I couldn’t find anybody, so I got a drink and went to the balcony, and then I saw him, hanging off the ledge of the balcony. I kicked his hands, but he wouldn’t fall, so I threw a Refrigerator at him, and I fell with the Refrigerator."
God busted out laughing and let him in.
The next person walked up and God told him the same thing he told the other person. God told him that he didn’t think that he could make him laugh more than the first person. The second guy said, "So get this, I’m a window washer on the 8th floor. I’m washing the windows like normal, and this enraged psychopath walks up and starts kicking my hands, and then he throws a refrigerator at me and I die."
God bursts out laughing so much to where he falls off his chair, and he lets the guy through. The next guy comes up and God tells him the same thing he told the last two people, and he tells him that there is no way that he can make him laugh more than the other two did. So he starts talking. "So get this, I’m in a refrigerator..."
How fast is the speed of sex?
68 because at 69 you've got to turn around.
How do you know if an Asian is an orphan?
If their grade was only an A.
How do you punish a blind kid?
Move to a new house.
How do you leave an idiot in suspense? I'll tell you tomorrow!
How did Santa feel when he got stuck in the chimney?
Claus-trophobic.