Hows jokes
A teacher is teaching a class algebra. Timmy, you've worked out it is AK, but what is 59 minus 12? Timmy shakes his head, not knowing. The teacher asks, "How about AK 49 minus 2?" Timmy replies with um... The teacher becomes frustrated and yells, "What comes after AK, Timmy!?" The white kid at the back stands, shouts 47, and pulls the trigger.
It's amazing how dog owners can make their dogs shout different things. For example, Czech dogs go "barf," American dogs go "woof," and Chinese dogs go "sizzle."
How does an octopus laugh? Buble buble.
I was the manager at a McDonald’s in Turin when I saw Penaldo walk in and submit a job application. I asked him to show me his skills and experience, but he just started diving and asking for pens and tap-ins. I was confused until Penaldo told me that’s all he knows how to do.
How can you tell if a heterosexual man has been using a computer?
There is sperm on the screen.
How do you get a Japanese fanclub?
Walk around with a bundle of gas masks!
How do you know a vampire's sick?
If he's coffin (coughing?)
It's funny dating someone smarter than you. My girlfriend knows how to push my buttons but never takes into account what a dick I can be if need be. Let me explain. Say, for example, she calls me retarded, I remind her that she's dating me.
(To a thief) If you like taking things, how about you take my life?
How do Chinese people name their babies?
They chuck a pan down the stairs.
How do you name a Chinese kid?
Throw a frying pan on their head, "Ching Chong!"
How sexy is Ariana Grande?
How do the men with bisexual tendencies that are members in the Kingdom Hall of Jehovah's Witnesses have sex with other men without being disfellowshiped in the Jehovah's Witnesses Church?
Anonymous sex at a glory hole inside the men's restroom at a gay bar.
How do you know when Kobe Bryant is famous?
His face was chiseled in a mountain.
How do you clean the ocean?
With tide!
Sad to think about legend O.G. Mudbone being no longer with us.
I’m only curious how they closed his casket.
Let me tell you how I escaped Iraq. Iran! (;)
How come lepers don't play cards?
Well, if they lose a couple of hands...
What's a chair's favorite snack?
Chair-ies or Cherries if that's how you wanna spell it .3.
How do you make an elephant float?
One elephant, two scoops of ice cream, and a lot of root beer!