House jokes
How does a rapper clean their house?
With a BEAT BRUSH!
An electrician walks into a green house. He sees a red room. He wonders why it's red because Kurt Cobain and his shotgun were sitting there.
Why are orphans bad at poker?
They don’t know what a full house is.
Your mom is so fat Buzz Lightyear had to say "To infinity to beyond" to leave her house.
My mom told me that my friend Paul is coming over, and he is going to sleep over, so I was happy.
The next day, I ask my mom, "Where's the dog?" My mom asks me, "What dog?"
Then I said to my mom, "I heard Paul say, 'Do you want it doggy?' and you said 'Yeah.'"
My mom went to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.
Having cockroaches in the house is a sign that you've food.
These things are like Ugandan girls, they hate poverty.
What did the mom say to her house? "I love you"
Why did the grandpa leave the house to go to the grocery store?
To get the ice cream for the grandma.
Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house?
No? Neither did he.
A friend sits across from me at class so I asked if she wants to hang out sometimes. She said yes, so I called her over to my house, and that's the day I found out she was a guy.
The moral of the story: don't try to fuck your friends.
What kind of dress does a Roblox Floppa house have?
"ADDRESS!"
I wanted to fall off a cliff, sadly, there aren't any cliffs near my house.
What did the bulldozer say to the house?
"I wanna bulldoze houses!"
I called an orphan's house, saying: "Are your parents home yet?"
He started crying.
What color is Stephen Hawking's house?
It's a bungalow.
Roses are red, my toaster too,
Oh shit, I've burnt the house down, what do I do?
A man goes for a pee in a haunted house.
He unzips his pants at the urinal when a man dressed as a goblin chuckles next to him. "You got a small dick, buddy," the man says to him.
Time for a random Terraria joke.
Q: Why did the guide die at his house?
A: The player dropped his doll in the lava.
(WALL OF FLESH HAS AWOKEN) :| Oh crap!
Why do orphans look at a house for so long?
'Cause they never had one.