House jokes
Okay, long story fast, I walked to GameStop in my house, in the kitchen, by Walmart, to a BTS Squid Game concert, and Drake and Pablo were there for her labor in the Cowboys stadium by Nike, so I bought a pencil from a dead alive man. He said "ZOO WEE MAMA." So yeah.
Bob: Can I come to your house to meet your family?
Orphan: I don't have a family.
What show can the orphan relate to... Full House.
Earth is full. Go home!
What runs around a yard without actually moving? A fence.
I'm thinking about telling my daughter there's a ghost in the house. At least then I can wear a bed sheet at night and fuck her without her being suspicious.
Apparently I'm not allowed home after house fires, but the neighbors, their house burnt lovely.
Please stop hurting people's feelings, or they'll hang around the house.
Why can’t orphans fly? Because they’re still winging it.
My wife said, "Why oh why have you ordered carpet, our house is lovely?"
Thankfully the carpet was put to good use in the end, no more stupid comments coming from a rolled up Emily in the bottom of the ocean!
My friend’s neighbor’s house is a real pigsty. There are hogs everywhere wearing neck garments.
If you're a cat person, never let hungry Chinese into your house. They might just have a snack.
How do you enter your house?
Through Bill Gates!
There’s going to be a wild party at the orphanage tonight...
The parents aren’t home.
What happens to an orphan that gets on house arrest?
They get set free.
What's an orphan's dream job?
A builder, to build themselves a home.
I went to my girlfriend's house one day in Alabama when I met her brother. He said, "Well, I guess there's no more you stuck in the dryer."
People have houses, but I don't have a house because I don't have parents, said the orphan.
Why can't orphans play House Flipper?
'Cause they don't know what to do.
Someone threatened to break into my house, but I am in a wheelchair. I said sure, and I moved everything upstairs and sat on the stairs so he couldn’t steal anything.