Hitler

Hitler jokes

Parent

What did Hitler say after his parents bought a hauler?

How much did the haulla-cost?

  • 7
  • Difference

    what's the difference between hitler and you?

    one didn't keep posting on twitter about killing themselves.

  • 8
  • Feminist

    What's the difference between Hitler and a feminist?

    At least Hitler actually did something.

  • 8
  • Difference

    Q: What’s the difference between Usain Bolt and Adolf Hitler?

    A: One got to finish a race.

    Book

    What is Hitler's favorite book? "Hitler and the chamber of secrets."

    Priest

    Apparently, as a 4-year-old, Hitler was saved from drowning in the river Passau by a local priest.

    Goes to show once more that a lot of problems would be solved if priests could just keep their hands off kids.

    History

    The gas prices are going up so much that even Hitler is killing himself.

  • 1
  • Oven

    What do you call it when Hitler puts retards in the oven? Baked potatoes.

  • 2
  • Gun

    I own a gun with Nazi rounds and shot a guy who broke into my house. He said, “Did you just shoot me with a Nazi round?” and I replied, “Do you mean Nein millimeter?”

    German

    To be the perfect German, you need to be as thin as Göring, as tall as Goebbels, and as blonde as Hitler.

  • 2
  • Asylum

    Hitler visits a lunatic asylum. The patients give the Hitler salute. As he passes down the line, he comes across a woman who isn't saluting.

    "Why are you not saluting like the others?" Hitler barks.

    "Mein Führer, I'm the nurse," she responds. "I'm not crazy!"

  • 3
  • Niece

    Q. What did Hitler give his niece for her birthday?

    A. An easy bake oven.

    Golf

    Why did Hitler stop playing Golf?

    He kept getting stuck in the Bunker.