Hitler Jokes

What the difference between a feminist and Hitler?

Both were good at starting wars, only difference was Hitler knew when to kill himself afterwards.

What did Hitler feel about all the jokes about him? Führereous

If you’re forced to have it as a child, you won’t like it as an adult.

I guess hitler was forced to have vegetables when he was younger.

Ruin a quote by attributing it to the wrong person "Don't cry because it is over. Smile because it happened." -Adolf Hitler, 1945

What is hitler's favourite food? A hindenburger

Why did hitler kill himself?

He didn’t want to pay the gas bill

The only person I’d have a cooking lesson with is Hitler

when the teacher calls on you and asks you how many people did Hitler kill.

"One, he killed himself"

What car does Hitler drive?

A fuhrerri.

I saw this really old guy with the Hitler stache, so I decided to start beating him up. It was very weird when a camera crew came out with Harrison Ford and started yelling at me.

I would like to say Hitler gave two fucks about his people

But quite Anne frankly I'd be lying

Why did Hitler turn to genocide after a failed career as an artist? He never learned to mix the colors

What type of car did hitler drive? A gas-guzzler.

Vladimir Putin, Donald Trump and Angela Merkel are standing at the shore and are trying to impress each other with the accomplishments of their countries. Putin brags „We have nuclear submarines which can stay under water for six weeks without having to resurface!“. Trump goes on „Six weeks? That’s nothing. I have the best submarines, they‘re underwater für at least three months!“. Merkel is about to respond, when a giant steel colossus emerges from the sea. A hatch opens, a black uniform appears - „Heil Hitler! We need Diesel.“