Hitler jokes
Voting for Hillary because of her political experience is like...
Hiring Hitler as a birthday magician because he made 6,000,000 people disappear.
Hitler walks into his meeting room, turns to his trusted staff, and says, “I want you to organize the execution of 10,000 Jews and one kitten.”
Everyone looks around the table and, after a long silence, Goering pipes up. “Mein Fuhrer, why do you want to kill a kitten?”
Hitler smiles and turns to the rest of the table. “You see, no one cares about the Jews.”
Your mum is so bad at cooking, Gordon Ramsey brought back Hitler to show her how to use an oven.
Hitler visits a lunatic asylum. The patients give the Hitler salute. As he passes down the line, he comes across a woman who isn't saluting.
"Why are you not saluting like the others?" Hitler barks.
"Mein Führer, I'm the nurse," she responds. "I'm not crazy!"
Say what you want about Hitler, at least he got the trains to run on time.
Osama Bin Laden, Josef Stalin, and Hitler are robbing a bank, who do the cops shoot first?
A black guy.
Where does Hitler look first when he loses something? The attic.
What’s the difference between Hitler and a bug?
Nothing.
What did Gordon Ramsay say to Hitler?
“Oh my god, put them back in the damn ovens! They’re so under-cooked they’re writing fucking diaries!”
What’s the difference between a female farmer and Hitler’s girlfriend?
One bails her hay, and the other heils her bae.
What type of car did Hitler drive? A gas-guzzler.
Why did Hitler kill himself?
He didn’t want to pay the gas bill.
What's the most common thing between Hitler and an emo?
Hitler knows when to kill himself!
Who killed Hitler goes to Heaven.
*looks up*
Oh, never mind.
What can an Olympic runner do that Hitler can't?
Finish a race.
Unlike the Americans, Hitler knew when to kill himself.
My granddad killed Hitler.
What’s the difference between Hitler and Steven Hawking?
Nothing, they're both dead, one painted the walls and the other committed suicide by pressing ALT + F4.
Why does no one like Hitler when he goes to the movies?
Because he would count, "zehn, neun", and then it would all turn green.
He wasn't that bad.