Hitler

Hitler jokes

Train

Say what you want about Hitler, at least he got the trains to run on time.

Difference

What’s the difference between Hitler and Steven Hawking?

Nothing, they're both dead, one painted the walls and the other committed suicide by pressing ALT + F4.

Emo kid

What do emo kids and Hitler have in common?

There's gonna be more brains on the wall when they lose something.

Kitten

Hitler walks into his meeting room, turns to his trusted staff, and says, β€œI want you to organize the execution of 10,000 Jews and one kitten.”

Everyone looks around the table and, after a long silence, Goering pipes up. β€œMein Fuhrer, why do you want to kill a kitten?”

Hitler smiles and turns to the rest of the table. β€œYou see, no one cares about the Jews.”

Donald Trump

All those people claiming Donald Trump is like Hitler need a reality check.

After all, it's not like Donald Trump could write a book.

Birthday

What did Hitler get for his 6th birthday?

A Kewpie burger and an Easy-Bake Oven.

History

"Sir, we're mining too many useless mineral ores."

Hitler: "Mine less, then."

Grammar Nazi bursts in: "MINE FEWER!"

Hitler looks over: "Yes?"

Mum

Your mum is so bad at cooking, Gordon Ramsey brought back Hitler to show her how to use an oven.

Oven

Roses are red, eggs come in a dozen, do I need to revive Hitler to teach you how to use a goddamn oven?

Oven

What's the difference between you and Hitler? At least he knows how to use an oven.