History jokes
What died on 9/11? 2,996 people.
Why is Martin Luther King so bad at laundry?
He won't separate the whites from the colors...
Man 1: Why don’t we just put all the debt in the world on one man, then kill him?
Man 2: We tried that once. It started a cult.
Why are Americans so bad at Clash of Clans? Cause they already lost two towers.
Why are the Americans good at Rubik's cubes? Because they have a long history of separating colors.
If I make a summer camp for kids with concentration problems, will it be a "Concentration Camp"?
How 9/11 Happened!:
Hey Bush, Truth or dare?
I’m old enough to remember innocent times when the worst headline was plane hijackers flying into buildings.
Why is America so bad at chess?
Because they already lost two towers.
It was the year 1912. I was in the SS Titanic, and I woke from a dream to think, "I've heard of wet dreams, but is that WATER?"
What is Julius Caesar’s favorite food?
Roman noodles.
What’s the difference between prison and concentration camps?
At least you don’t die when you shower.
What's black and white?
History.
You travel to the past into the era where Julius Caesar is still alive. He thinks you may be from the future to bring him good news. He asks you, "How do I die?"
You reply with: "Surrounded by friends."
Why don't Romans find algebra interesting?
X is always 10.
Did you ever think that John F. Kennedy went for a ride in Dallas just to clear his head?
A wild Iceberg appears! Titanic uses ram! It is not very effective. (Titanic sinks.)
America once was known as an Obama nation. Now we're known as an abomination.
Why did Adolf Hitler like nuts? He only had one.
"Why do people call Americans excessive?"
"It was probably because of WWII."
"Oh, you mean the war where America responded to the destruction of several ships and a harbor and the deaths of a little over a thousand by completely flattening two cities and killing hundreds of thousands of people?"