History jokes
Help, my ADHD is so bad that not even I can focus in a concentration camp.
What is Hitler's favorite book? "Hitler and the chamber of secrets."
My favorite sex position is the JFK. I splatter all over her while she screams and tries to get out of the car.
Osama Spin Laden, dropping beats like the twin towers.
Why do Nazis not wear necklaces, rings, and bracelets? Because they hate jewelry.
Article 1: the Titanic is practically unsinkable.
Article 4: the Titanic sank.
Titanic, doing the polar plunge before it was cool.
We all know that Lincoln and Kennedy are the most open-minded presidents in the world.
Did you know my grandpa was part of World War 2? He killed Hitler.
What flavor of pizza did the Twin Towers order?...
Plane.
Why is the Leaning Tower of Pisa leaning? Because it has faster reflexes than the Twin Towers.
Where did JFK go in his car? I am not sure of his intentional destination, but he did go everywhere.
Where was Moses when the lights went out? - In the dark!
I think Abraham Lincoln was gay because a guy shot from behind.
What do you call someone who used to kill people? An ex-executioner.
Roses are red, eggs come in a dozen, do I need to revive Hitler to teach you how to use a goddamn oven?
Wonder why the Japanese people didn't see the bombs coming?
They didn't open their eyes.
If Martin Luther King were white, what would they call him?
Alive.
How do you punish Helen Keller? You stick a toilet plunger in the toilet.
Why can't Helen Keller have kids? It went up too far.
Your hairline and my grandpa go way back.