Currency jokes

People are pushing for a new black Lady Liberty coin. I can't wait to use black people as currency again.

An American woman married a British man. On their honeymoon, the British husband said, "You look like a million pounds!" The wife divorced him.

Do you want to hear a money joke? "Never mind, it makes no cents."

What is the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Well, beer nuts are 49 cents, but deer nuts are just under a buck. (If you don’t understand the genders of deer, you won’t understand it.)

Yo mama like a penny: two-faced, worthless, and in everybody’s pants.

My brother once froze a dollar in a block of ice. I called it "cold hard cash."

Location is in London by the way.

One day a fatass came home and told his friend that he lost money.

His friend: "Oh for once you lost some pounds!"

What do you call a Chinese millionaire?

Cha ching.

What did the dime say to the penny? At least I have more cents than you.

I'm not gay, but fifty dollars is fifty dollars.

Your mom is like a penny: two-faced, flat, and always in someone's pants.

Yo mama is so fat, she sat on a quarter and popped a booger out of George Washington's nose.

What concert only costs 45 cents?

50 Cent featuring Nickelback.

If the government can print money,

Then why are we paying taxes?

Would love to pound Sterling with a 14 lb hammer.

Most people call it grave robbing...

I prefer to call it cryptocurrency.

What is money called on the moon?

Mooney.

Where does a snowman keep his money?

In a snowbank.

If I had a dollar for every gender, I would have 2 dollars and a bunch of counterfeits.

So I was on a Discord call the other day, and one of my friends, an American buddy, joined, and we had a conversation.

Until they said: "When did pounds change to quid?"

And I said: "They're the exact same thing."

Then they said: "But when did it happen?"

So I said: "When did school change to shooting range?"