Do you want to hear a money joke? "Never mind, it makes no cents."
An American woman married a British man. On their honeymoon, the British husband said, "You look like a million pounds!" The wife divorced him.
What is the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Well, beer nuts are 49 cents, but deer nuts are just under a buck. (If you don’t understand the genders of deer, you won’t understand it.)
People are pushing for a new black Lady Liberty coin. I can't wait to use black people as currency again.
Yo mama like a penny: two-faced, worthless, and in everybody’s pants.
My brother once froze a dollar in a block of ice. I called it "cold hard cash."
Location is in London by the way.
One day a fatass came home and told his friend that he lost money.
His friend: "Oh for once you lost some pounds!"
What do you call a Chinese millionaire?
Cha ching.
What did the dime say to the penny? At least I have more cents than you.
Your mom is like a penny: two-faced, flat, and always in someone's pants.
Yo mama is so fat, she sat on a quarter and popped a booger out of George Washington's nose.
I'm not gay, but fifty dollars is fifty dollars.
Would love to pound Sterling with a 14 lb hammer.
What concert only costs 45 cents?
50 Cent featuring Nickelback.
Where does a snowman keep his money?
In a snowbank.
What is money called on the moon?
Mooney.
Most people call it grave robbing...
I prefer to call it cryptocurrency.
If I had a dollar for every gender, I would have 2 dollars and a bunch of counterfeits.
So I was on a Discord call the other day, and one of my friends, an American buddy, joined, and we had a conversation.
Until they said: "When did pounds change to quid?"
And I said: "They're the exact same thing."
Then they said: "But when did it happen?"
So I said: "When did school change to shooting range?"
What is the capital of Greece? -- About 10 dollars.
