Currency jokes

People are pushing for a new black Lady Liberty coin. I can't wait to use black people as currency again.

An American woman married a British man. On their honeymoon, the British husband said, "You look like a million pounds!" The wife divorced him.

Do you want to hear a money joke? "Never mind, it makes no cents."

What is the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Well, beer nuts are 49 cents, but deer nuts are just under a buck. (If you don’t understand the genders of deer, you won’t understand it.)

Yo mama like a penny: two-faced, worthless, and in everybody’s pants.

My brother once froze a dollar in a block of ice. I called it "cold hard cash."

Location is in London by the way.

One day a fatass came home and told his friend that he lost money.

His friend: "Oh for once you lost some pounds!"

What do you call a Chinese millionaire?

Cha ching.

What did the dime say to the penny? At least I have more cents than you.

I'm not gay, but fifty dollars is fifty dollars.

Your mom is like a penny: two-faced, flat, and always in someone's pants.

Yo mama is so fat, she sat on a quarter and popped a booger out of George Washington's nose.

What concert only costs 45 cents?

50 Cent featuring Nickelback.

Would love to pound Sterling with a 14 lb hammer.

What is money called on the moon?

Mooney.

Where does a snowman keep his money?

In a snowbank.

If I had a dollar for every gender, I would have 2 dollars and a bunch of counterfeits.

So I was on a Discord call the other day, and one of my friends, an American buddy, joined, and we had a conversation.

Until they said: "When did pounds change to quid?"

And I said: "They're the exact same thing."

Then they said: "But when did it happen?"

So I said: "When did school change to shooting range?"

What is the capital of Greece? -- About 10 dollars.

There was a little boy named Chris who was addicted to Roblox.

One day, his grandpa fell into a deep coma caused by a head injury.

One day, little Chris went to visit his poor grandpa. He brought his Windows 10 too, but it had no charge in it. After pulling out some wires and placing his into the wall, he started to hear a long beeping sound, but ignored it and continued to play Roblox. Chris's parents came and saw what had happened.

The dad then yelled, "You dumb f***, you killed my father!!!"

Then Chris said "Yeah. He was worth robucks, too."