History jokes
How do you kill a Catholic?
Crucify them...
Why did Steven Hawking die?
A quad rasher ran him over.
Q: What did Jesus say when he got nailed to the cross?
A: Owwww!!!!!
What was the last thing that went through the minds of the 9/11 jumpers?
Their ankles.
Lololol get it? They fell from like 100 feet.
When Caesar’s wife told him she dreamed he should beware the Ides of March, he scoffed and said, “What? It’s not like I’m gonna be stabbed 23 times by my best buddies!”
Why were the people during 9/11 mad? They ordered 2 sausage pizzas, but instead they got 2 plane pizzas.
America Twin Tower: "Hey, have you seen the Malaysian Twin Tower? I have, but only from 1971 to 2001."
Malaysian Twin Tower: "I STOOD LONGER!"
Would it be wrong of me to yell “Jenga!” or “Timber!” while my class is watching a 9/11 documentary?
What's a pirate's favorite letter? You'd think it's the "R," but it's really the "C."
9/11 wasn’t the date, it was the score.
Stop making jokes about 9/11, my dad died in 9/11.
BEST PILOT OF SOUTHERN ARABIA
ALAKBAR
Are you the Twin Towers? Because I would smash you.
9/11 was a round of Clash of Clans. They knocked down two towers, not three.
Your hair goes so far back in time, even cavemen saw it!
Your hairline goes so far back that the History Channel made a show about it.
What if Hitler did not say "bombs away," he said "lambs are slayed?"
Face the truth, Jake could have went on the door, but Rose wanted him to die.
Why is my pee green? Because, "NEIN, ITCH BIEN FIRST REICH!"
Yo mama so old her Bible was autographed by Jesus.
How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it!