History jokes
9/11 jokes are the bomb.
Frank: "I am named Frank because my grandpa lived in Frankfurt during his best years."
Finley: "I am named Finley because my grandmother was in Finland during her early twenties!"
Mia: "Can we please change the subject?"
why are people in japan so slim? because the last time a fatman came, they lost half their population.
Are you an archaeologist? Because I’ve got a bone for you to examine.
Mickey Mouse is speaking with a divorce attorney...
...and the attorney says, "I'm sorry Mickey, I've gone over all of Minnie's medical history and I find no evidence of mental illness."
To which Mickey replies, "I didn't say she's crazy! I said she's fucking Goofy!"
I went up to my mom and asked how humanity started. She said it started with monkeys, so I went up to my dad and asked. My dad said it all started with Adam and Eve, so I told my dad that mom said humanity started with monkeys, and dad said mom was telling her side of the story. LOL🤣
I was hit on by President Kennedy, too bad I shot him down.
"the floor is lava!"
- everyone, Pompeii 79 A.D.
I'm pretty sure that 9/11 was the biggest game of Jenga ever recorded in history.
Where was Moses when the lights went out? - In the dark!
When the teacher calls on you and asks you how many people did Hitler kill?
"One, he killed himself."
Why do Nazis not wear necklaces, rings, and bracelets? Because they hate jewelry.
Osama Bin Laden is his name.
Crashing planes is his game.
Me traveling back in time to tell Americans there will be a big tsunami on 9/11/2001, and to survive it they have to climb the two tallest buildings in New York.
I wasn’t understanding what I had to do for homework, so my teacher said, “Let me break it down for you like the Twin Towers.”
Why was Hitler bad at math?
He could only count to nein.
What is the worst thing about breaking up with a Japanese girl?
You need to drop the bomb twice on her before she gets it.
Why did Hitler stop playing Golf?
He kept getting stuck in the Bunker.
Why were the Twin Towers mad? Because they ordered pepperoni pizza, but all they got was plane.
What 3 words started Jeffery Dahmer's cannibalism?
This isn't ketchup.