History jokes
"hipede hop hiped d the twin towers will be gone tomoreo at 8:43"
Why can’t you tell JFK facts about Dallas?
Last time he was there, he got his mind blown.
My history teacher asked my class what time they would go back to just to see what happened.
I said I'd go back to Hitler's childhood to tell him the lies that he becomes the ruler of the world by starting the Nazis, and leave his death out of the discussion.
White people: *come to America, meet natives and take food, kill them, rape them, and enslave them.*
Natives: Can y-
White people: Hey, you remember all that horrible sh*t we did to you? Let's have a good laugh about it over dinner with your buddies and my new wives.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Not the two Twin Towers.
Q: What is Hitler's least favorite grocery store?
A: Jew-Osco
You're old enough to remember when emojis were called "hieroglyphics."
An Aboriginal Australian told me that I was on his farmland.
So I told him he was on my cock.
(I'm Australian btw, respect to my American bros🇺🇸)
What’s the difference between a Jew and an American? The American makes it out of camp.
The only thing brighter than my cuteness is the fire on the Twin Towers.
Why is 4/20 such an epic date?
Because it's weed day, Columbine, AND Hitler's birthday;)
What is similar between Hitler and Trump?
They both want to keep races out.
I guess in British chess they play without a queen...
But in American chess they play without two towers.
...
What do Monica and Bill Clinton have in common? They both did not inhale. Lol.
What were Princess Diana's last words?
Have you been Dri...?
So, at school there are these twins. At my school, I folded two paper airplanes to throw at them. Once I realized why it felt so wrong to do it, I had already threw them. I hit the north, then the south one.
Michael Jackson is like a TV from the 1900s: black and white.
What’s the difference between Isaac Newton and the kid I kidnapped?
Isaac Newton died a virgin.
I was watching a documentary about how storks carry babies from their previous life to the next.
In his old life, Michael Jackson must’ve been a teddy bear. The storks let him play with kids for a change.