History jokes
What Lord of the Rings book is banned from the United States?
The Two Towers.
Someone in my class yelled "Jenga!" while watching a documentary about the Twin Towers.
What are the similarities between the twin towers and my ex?
They both went down on my dad.
Why are the Twin Towers mad?
They are like pepperoni and cheese as a plane.
You're old enough to remember when emojis were called "hieroglyphics."
A woman was in the Twin Towers. She orders a pepperoni pizza but got a plane pizza.
Guys, stop joking about 9/11. It's just plane wrong.
Why is England bad at chess?
'Cause they lost their queen.
Why was the entire population emo in the 1920s?
Because it was the Great Depression.
What is Osama bin Laden singing right now?
*cue the little mermaid* "Undaaa the sea, undaaa the sea"
And together we will make America great again.
You were never great in the first place.
Q: What is the difference between Michael Jackson & Neil Armstrong? A: Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson f@ck$ little kids in the a$$!
Are you George Floyd?
'Cause baby, you take my breath away... OOF!
What kind of birthday cake do you get on September 11th?
Three small ones, so you can have a flight of different cake flavors!
What's Osama bin Laden's favorite song?
"Under the Sea!" (The Little Mermaid)
What's Osama bin Laden's favorite song?
"Under the Sea," from The Little Mermaid.
Why are Americans so bad at Clash Royale?
Because they have already lost their towers.
Why did Hitler kill himself? Because the air was gas.
Why did Hittle kill himself? Because he wanted to buy a car, but then Hittler farted.
Why do Japanese people hate Christmas?
Because the last time a "FatMan" went down their chimney they lost half of their population.