A blind kid was talking to me because he was getting bullied...
I told him, "Just tell them what you see!"
Him Jokes
I was playing hide-n-seek with my dad and he hid, but I could never find him till this day.
Why was the rapper afraid of ghosts?
Because they kept booing him off stage!
Little Jim's friend told him that if he farts, he will give him a tenner. Little Jim tries to fart, but he poos himself, and he is bullied until he puts the poo on the bullies' face.
I beat up a failed musician until he started crying.
I thought a few hits would cheer him up!
Yo mama so strict that when Ponyboy told her that Darry hit him, she called the cops on Darry.
I set a gay person on fire. We now call him LGBBQ.
Friend: Do you know him?
Other Friend: Know who?
Friend: My dick!
RAID HIM https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZEAEVyTsAdnjawrdCkDu-A/videos
My brother has a fucking ass and I wake up to him twerking.
A farmer told me that he wanted a couple of acres, so I punched him in the teeth.
A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"
And the women look at him as if they have never seen a man walk into a bar before.
I saw Simba walking slowly.
I told him "Mufasa!"
Angelina Jolie was married to Brad Pitt...
Does that make her a "Brad Nailer", and him a "Jolie Jumper"?
My friend was getting bullied so I went over and asked him to stop. It went a little bit like this:
Me: Dude, leave her alone. Him: Beat it, b*tch. *lots of arguing and swearing* Me: Ya know! The smartest thing that ever came outta your mouth was probably a penis. Him: *walks away*
LEGO Ninjago - I like it, okay?
Which of the ninja would be best for an undercover mission as the person in disguise?
Kai. He just has to leave his hair down and no one would know it was him. He uses hair gel, as Cole has said a couple times I think, because his hair looks like fire 🔥!
My kid runs in today to tell me that he found a floating cow, but when he got me to come and see, all I saw was a piñata with a tail and white spots. Such a stupid child. So after that I gave him a nice refreshing drink from the toilet and a few of those chocolate sprinkles. (: I'm such a good parent...
Little Timmy is hanging out with Rapunzel, and he mentions Hugo and a few other characters from Varian And The Seven Kingdoms, and she responds with, “Who the frick are you talking about? Since I don’t know them, I got a surprise for you!” She wraps him up in Christmas wrapping paper labeled "For Eugene."
Teacher: Tell me a moral story.
Little Johnny: Once my grandfather was in WW2. He saw everyone praising to kill him. For example, we should sneak up and kill him. We get the helicopter above and shoot him from there. My grandfather heard this, he got his gun and shot them all.
Teacher: What is the moral even?
Little Johnny: Never plan to kill my grandfather.
jacethehater, you are a hater, and it needs to stop! Waterhsharky is very nice to people, so leave him alone for whatever he/she did or did not do. He did not do nothing. So leave him/her alone. Plus, making threats to people is very bad, and comments can be seen everywhere! So don't get too cocky with everything.
