Her jokes
So a lady came up to me today at the bank, and she asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
I told this knock knock joke to Helen Keller...
Me: Knock Knock
Her:
If Sakura's head looks like earth, then her hairline has to look like the Milky Way.
Everyone at the Queen's funeral:
Me and the boys getting her reboot card.
Who likes Fortnite? Gwen Stacy is in the game, let's goooooo! I love her!
Yo mama so fat, her birth certificate was an apology letter.
My uncle died on 9/11. Her last words were "Allahu Akbar."
Hey, my sister said you're Mattick, so I decided to swim with her and she threw a ball at me, so I went to my dad and she said, "Why did you tell dad?" She was crying because I’m not getting a car seat.
A friend sits across from me at class so I asked if she wants to hang out sometimes. She said yes, so I called her over to my house, and that's the day I found out she was a guy.
The moral of the story: don't try to fuck your friends.
Yo momma so fat, when she went for a health consultation, the doc told her to make do with health insurance.
I did this to my ex. I stole her wheelchair. I knew she would come crawling back.
She’s got 20 dudes in her DMs telling her she is pretty. Stand out, call her ugly.
Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They put a plunger in the toilet.
Q: How many kids did Helen Keller have? A: None, the plunger went all the way up.
There's only one reason our Education Minister is standing by this curriculum.
In her religion, you NEVER pull out.
Who makes more money, a drug dealer or a prostitute?
A prostitute, because she can always wash her crack and sell it again.
Ur momma's so fat that when she became a spy her codename was OObese.
Me and my wife love playing table tennis. I couldn’t win all day, but when it got dark, I managed to beat her. I don’t know how the police found out so quickly.
Me: What did my sister do when she dressed up as Elsa and I gave her a balloon?
You: What?
Me: She let it go, let it go!
My friend said she was tired of seeing me every day.
So I pushed her off the side of a cliff.
A sister went to her brother's room and says,
"I'm scared, can I sleep with you?"
"Yes, sis."
"What is this?" (pointing at his dick)
"My pet snake."
"Can I pet it?"
"Yes."
He wakes up in a hospital.
"What happened?"
"Your snake spit on me, so I bit his head off."
"You dummy!"
"Whaaat?"