Happening jokes
What happened when the fire used Tinder?
He luckily got a lot of matches.
can someone please tell what happened?
What will happen if orphans use an iPhone?
They can't find the home button.
If 9/11 happened again, I want to share a selfie of me flying that plane.
Say "joke" 5 times.
Oh, nothing happened.
Memes
That would be one hell of a war if it actually happens in the future
Susie: Ling Ling, truth or dare?
Ling Ling: Truth.
Susie: What happened to Stacie's dog?
Ling Ling: Dare.
What happened to Stephen Hawking after he reached Heaven?
Nothing yet. He is still struggling to get up the stairway to Heaven.
They say that bad things happen to good people.
So if you get run over by a car just know you're a good person.
Q: Two skeletons walk into a bar. What happens?
A: They fall.
(They walked into a BAR, as in a rod or whatnot.)
What happened to the gator when he walked into the hospital?
He became Gatorade.
What happens when a pun isn’t funny?
It gets PUNished.
What happens when you eat a cat?
I love to eat cats for dinner!
Beauty is blind? Ya damn right, 'cause that's what happened when she saw your ass.
You're at a buffet, you think you're hungry for two, but misfortune happens when you think of yourself. You get stuck looking at sides in the buffet. A roly poly gal you see in the corner of your eye, eyeballing the main dishes in front at the end. You go in for the pickings, you get intercepted by a far more hungrier matter, but you find yourself getting slammed over the buffet table, and realize you are gasping for air, and she is tenderizing you for dinner.
"What happens when an Asian man runs into a brick wall?"
"A broken nose."
A man goes into the streets of Moscow and yells, “I am tired of this guy with a silly mustache and stupid rules being a leader!”
A soldier heard him, so he goes and catches him. Later, he brings the man to Stalin. The soldier says to Stalin what happened and Stalin asks the man, “Who were you thinking about when you yelled in the streets?”
The man responds, “Of course, I was thinking about Hitler!”
Stalin lets him go, but then he stops the soldier and says, “Who were YOU thinking about?”
I asked my uncle why he was living on the streets.
He said that he wasn't always on the streets, he used to have a job at these two towers. I asked him what happened, and he said two planes happened.
They have blackboards and whiteboards, but what happened to Mexicanboards?
What happens when Stephen Hawking wakes up from his sleep?
"Log in."
Mom, what happens if you swear at a church?
Well, honey, a tee posing nun with glowing red eyes and nunchucks will beat you.