Happening jokes

It's hard to predict the future,

especially before it happens.

What happens to Freedom Towers if they got hit? They stepped in Ground Zero.

What happens when you fail to be an emo? You don't make the cut.

A sister went to her brother's room and says,

"I'm scared, can I sleep with you?"

"Yes, sis."

"What is this?" (pointing at his dick)

"My pet snake."

"Can I pet it?"

"Yes."

He wakes up in a hospital.

"What happened?"

"Your snake spit on me, so I bit his head off."

"You dummy!"

"Whaaat?"

Roses are red,

Violets are blue.

God made me pretty, what happened to you?

I was talking to a Muslim yesterday, and he asked me what it's like to be blind.

I happened to tell him about 20 jokes; in fact, I was working on my twentieth. So I answered with, "At least I don't have to screw in light bulbs. It's not like I need the damn things anyway."

You were born on the freeway, you know why?

Because that's where a lot of accidents happen. 😈

What happened when a hammer punished the nail?

He hit him.

What happens when you eat salmon with Nutella?

You get salmonella.

Q: Did you hear about the Twin Towers?

A: No, what happened?

Q: Apparently, the design was fundamentally floored!

What Happens When You Get Caught On Fire?

— You Lost To Slmebody When You Were Playing Hide And Seek, And The Place Where You Got Caught Was Exactly On A Patch Of Fire.

An Irish man walks out of a bar. It can happen.

What happens when the music note starts to misbehave?

Then he gets into treble!

A blonde crashes an airplane.

Officer: Could you please explain to me what happened?

Woman: It got so cold in the plane, I turned the fan off.

Officer: *face palms self*

Also officer: Here's your sign.

What happens when you cross a pig and karate?

A pork chop!

What happens if you sit under a cow?

You get a pat on the head.

Jim walks into a bar and asks for a shot of vodka. He then says to the barkeep, "Who's the toughest guy in here?"

The barkeep points to a man at the pool table. Jim then knocked him out and paid for the shot and left. He did this every Friday for 2 months. Finally, the barkeep is pissed because Jim keeps knocking out all of his customers. He then orders a gorilla and puts him in the bathroom.

Jim walks into the bar and gets another shot of vodka. He asks again, "Who's the toughest guy in here tonight?" The bartender points to the bathroom and says he's in there. Jim walks into the bathroom and everyone in the bar can hear yelling and screaming. The bartender asks, "What happened in there?" Jim smiles and says, "I don't know who that was, but when he wakes up tell him I put his fur jacket in the toilet."

What happens when you eat a cat?

I love to eat cats for dinner!

can someone please tell what happened?

A manager asked a black employee to work overtime. The employee initially agreed until he was told it would be without pay.

The employee responded with, "You know what happened last time my family worked for free?"

"What happened?" said the manager.

"A civil war."